Tues. March 24, 2026: Obstacles Add to the Stress

image courtesy of Džoko Stach from Pixabay

Tuesday, March 24, 2026

Waxing Moon

Cloudy and cold

A new week, and I feel like my own personal Mercury is still in retrograde. But you can read the Community Tarot Reading for the Week here, which is pretty powerful.

Got royalty statements from a pair of anthologies I was in a long time ago (both by the same publisher). They are still selling. We’re supposed to get royalties, but somehow, the numbers are always manipulated so we don’t. I mean, I got a nice chunk for writing in advance and then royalties for several years, so I’m not complaining, but I’m watching how they do this. They are also encouraging us to opt out of getting our statements twice a year. Nope, I’m keeping track, and I just may use my contractual right to an audit at some point.

The Anthropic filing deadline is coming up, but the Authors Guild keeps changing the parameters, and it’s very frustrating.

The information about Ceasar Chavez is not surprising, but I know it shocked a lot of people. This crap has been going on for centuries, and it needs to stop.

Then there are the war crimes this regime is committing against people all over the world, including Cuba. Congress is beyond useless. They tell us to “vote harder” and we do, and we put them in positions to create positive change, and then they do nothing, tell us they “don’t have the votes” (when in reality, they are voting against their constituents’ interests), and then tell us to vote harder again. I’m angry at all of them, even the ones I usually like.

Add to that the flooding in Hawaii and the fires in Nebraska, and the fact that our government doesn’t give a damn or do anything about it.

That Thing’s behavior toward the female Prime Minister of Japan was appalling. He keeps hitting new lows.

I added dates of goings on into my schedule –April is overbooked, and I have a feeling I will have to strip some of it back. I am not in my twenties anymore, and don’t have that stamina. Lots of good stuff, though, so it’s worth it.

I wrote up my workshop proposal during the gallery show month, and submitted it. I’ve asked for April 5, the opening weekend of the show. People are scheduling workshops on the Sundays, so as not to interfere with the advocacy work happening in the area on Saturdays. I figure I’ll just block off the Sundays in April and support my colleagues in their workshops, too.

My free write notebook came in handy, because I’d worked out the details of the workshop over a period of those sessions, and I could feed them into the proposal, and then I can use elements for the handouts.

Always good when an experiment turns out to be worth it. I have to say, these early morning free write sessions are helping me a lot.

I painted the next section of canvas for the collage. It looks good, has that fun, cartoony look I was going for.

Layered up, packed the rolly cart with all the books going back to the library, and headed out. The sidewalks were clear, so it was easy. Dropped off books, picked up books, did my next errand, got home. Easy peasy.

Hauled everything up the stairs, got it sorted by project.

Slogged through a lot of email. Did my marketing. (I’m good about that on weekdays, but usually forget to mention it in the post).

It was lovely and sunny when I ran my errands, but by lunchtime, it had clouded over.

The Journal Springboards workshop at the gallery was approved. I made a graphic and sent it off, too. I will add that into my newsletter this week, and do some more promotion than I usually do. The gallery is great about promotion, but I need to get off my tushie and do some, too.

I chugged along on the ghostwriting assignment when they got in touch to ask me to switch to the other assignment and finish it first, and have it ready much faster than we discussed. I don’t mind switching; I mind that, yet again, I have to make up time for things that were delayed on the other side of the table. I am NOT working through the weekend. I will do what I can within the agreed-upon work hours. It’s more complicated than that, but I can’t go into detail without breaking the NDA, and no, I cannot negotiate for a rush fee.

If I didn’t have the car kerflamma to deal with, I wouldn’t be as stressed.

I decided a different approach to the sculpture, and I will see if I can make it work. My original concept is too small to work in the space.

Saturday morning, I did some touch up work on the canvas background for “Lifecycle of a Public Information Request.” I then did some work on the text portion of “Stirring the Pot.”

It was supposed to be cloudy with a few showers. Instead, it snowed. It was very discouraging, since I had to tromp out and about.

Normally, on the Saturday closest to Spring Equinox, we’d switch out the fleece sheets for flannel, but with more snow incoming this week, it doesn’t make sense, so we’re sticking with fleece for at least another week.

Mid-morning, I layered up and trotted down to the store that claimed to sell wooden spoons (I had checked on their website). Only they didn’t. They had the frame I can use to hang the spoons from, so I got that. Which didn’t fit into my bag. I continued on my way to see if Big Y had any in their kitchen tools section. Only they no longer sell kitchen tools. CVS had none, which was not a surprise, but I checked just to make sure. I found a single pack of 3 spoons at Dollar General, and a pair of bamboo spoons that will work.

My goal was 16 spoons, so I had spare spoons. I planned 12 spoons for the piece. I now had 5.

My next stop was Berkshire Emporium. If you’ve never heard of them, check them out here.

They are quite something, and can be rather intimidating with the sheer volume of goods. I asked about wooden spoons, and was sent on a quest down to their lower level in the back.

In that section, I found enough silver-plated cutlery and vintage china to make me swoon. I also found a carving fork with a bone handle that matches the knife I inherited from my grandmother, although this one is monogrammed and ours is not. I grabbed it anyway (it was less than $5), along with a cutting board. And, digging in a bin way on the floor in the back, I found two wooden spoons.

Up to 7 now.

I was very excited.

Paid for everything, tromped home, dug through a kitchen drawer and found package of 3 wooden spoons I had bought at Christmas Tree Shops before the private equity firm who bought them destroyed them, because I noticed wooden spoons were getting harder to find.

Up to 10 spoons, decided to only use 9 in the sculpture. We have what we need.

Now I need to decide how to patina the pale ones, whether it’s using wood stain on them or painting them or trying to tea-dye them. I don’t have any spoons to spare, so I can’t experiment.

If I could have driven around to different stores, I probably could have found everything I needed, but it all had to be what I could get to on foot.

Ate lunch, had a fun ZOOM call with my friend. It was good to catch up.

Learned about all the deaths later in the afternoon: Former FBI Director Robert Mueller, actor Nicholas Brendon, and producer Robert Fox. We had our hopes up with Mueller’s investigation into That Thing, but Bill Barr manipulated the information, and That Thing got away with everything. So, of course, That Thing gloated and behaved with zero class and conduct completely unfitting to the office it claims to hold. Every time we think rock bottom’s been hit, it goes lower. Nicholas Brendon was best known for playing Xander in  the BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER series, and then for his struggles after the series ended. Charisma Carpenter, his former co-star, wrote a lovely remembrance that didn’t ignore the different facets. Incredibly well-phrased, and filled with warmth and good memories without denying the aftermath. Robert Fox was an old-school theatrical producer who could move with the times. He did a lot of David Hare’s work, among the many plays he produced in his career.

Printed out mock collage images, trying to get proportions right before I print out the images on clear labels and put them on the canvas.

Read a book for sort-of pleasure on a series that I keep reading, even though there are two or three points I question in every book. Three books is usually my cut-off point, but this was book 4, and I just ordered book 5 from the library, so I guess I’m reading at least one more. The first book was marketed as a mystery, and while the series pulls through an ongoing somewhat mysterious arc, it’s more contemporary women’s fiction. Also, because it’s written from multiple, and ever-expanding points of view, the reader is way ahead of the characters trying to solve the series-length arc, which doesn’t structurally satisfy me. But obviously there’s something I like about the characters and the story, because I keep reading. Trying to break down the “whys” on that is interesting, and then seeing if I learn something I can apply to my own work.

Did some work on contest entries. I want to wrap up one of the categories by next weekend. Once the two art pieces are done, I will focus on the contest more.

Cooked turkey meatloaf per request.

It was supposed to snow overnight Saturday into Sunday, but it was bucketing down rain instead, which I guess is better?

Tessa rousted me out of bed (I had hoped to sleep in). Morning routine was fine. I got the Community Tarot Reading for the Week done, which you can read here. All Major Arcana cards, which is a little intimidating, but they are overall positive cards.

Worked on the collage. I played with proportions until it looked right, or at least worked. It’s a cartoon, so they don’t need to be perfect, but they need to be somewhat grounded in reality. I kept tweaking different proportions.

Then, I printed it out on the clear label material to layer onto the collage – and it doesn’t work. It disappears into the background instead of popping. So I have to figure out something else. This is why I wanted to give myself plenty of time. I think I have to go even more grade-school cartoony with the whole thing.

I wished I had a working car, so I could get the rest of what I need for the wooden spoon hanging.

I had to do some admin work for my mom.

I did some percolating on both pieces and cooked a vegetable pasta for dinner. I was craving eggplant, for some reason, so we had eggplant, zucchini, peppers, tomato, corn with pasta and sauce. It was good, but we had quite a few leftovers.

I had a bad night. Tessa demanded I get up on time and feed everyone. The chime isn’t working on the meditation timer, so that was all thrown off. This is why I don’t like running my life by app. Trust the app, and it will still let you down. This is why I still have timers. And windup clocks. Turns out the meditation app disappeared from Google Play, which I learned when I tried to uninstall and reinstall it. It vanished, and there was nothing to reinstall. So I had to try and find another one. I’m trying a couple, and so far, they don’t measure up to the one I lost. I had saved times and different bell chimes for different meditations.

There was a ridiculous amount of construction noise outside, making it painful for me to work in my office. I had to deal with a bunch of admin, with the DPU, with the car insurance, etc.

People, do not fly right now. Cancel your vacations, your spring breaks. I mean, at this point, anyone who books something non-refundable is just being delusional anyway. That Thing’s private thug force is going to cause chaos and open the door for any terrorist or human trafficker to pretend to be federal agent and do whatever they want. To continue to go about your life as though nothing has happened and it won’t affect you will get you killed at this point. Stay home, and start riding your elected officials. Because you’re not going to get any sympathy when you whine on social media about being in line for hours and no one lets you jump the line. Don’t fly, unless it’s an emergency. Yes, some plans can’t be changed. But way too many people are in situations where things can be changed, and their sense of entitlement won’t let them.

The fact that eight Senators, including Cory Booker and Mark Kelly, couldn’t be bothered to show up to vote against Mullen’s confirmation for DHS is beyond appalling. Cory Booker should be in DC working, not out on a book tour. Dems shouldn’t accept “recess” – they should be working night and day to change things. Schumer and Jeffries both need to go.

That, on top of the accident at LaGuardia on Sunday night that cost a pilot and a co-pilot their lives, with 43 others injured.

I got some work done on the ghostwriting, then had to run an errand on foot, which was successful.

I then found out that the car repair, which was supposed to happen today, has been pushed off yet again, to Thursday. I am frantic at this point, because the car has to pass the second inspection no later than Monday.

I am well aware that they are backing me into a corner so they can overcharge me. And there’s no way out. I can’t go elsewhere, and I can’t get the part myself in time.

To say I am at my wit’s end with stress is an understatement.

Plus, it puts me into a major crunch to finish the art projects in time for the gallery show. Which is in jeopardy because I can’t get what I need by car, and it’s not stuff I can order. I need to see it in person.

I did manage to get the second ghostwriting deadline pushed to the 30th, instead of having them both this week.

I spent the bulk of the day on the ghostwriting, and am happy with it. I’m hoping a couple of tweaks and a polish today, and I can get it out the door late today, a little ahead of schedule.

Heated up leftovers for dinner. Read the next book for review. They’re changing how they pay out. They will “keep track” of the amounts owed instead of us invoicing – which I don’t trust for a second. They claim they will pay out any Friday that has enough reviews approved for a payout.

We’ll see.

On this morning’s agenda – I’m going to try to time it so I can catch a bus to a store I don’t like, but that is likely to have most of what I need for the next steps on the art projects. Because the busses only run once an hour, I will likely lose the entire morning going and coming back, but that’s the way it goes. At least I’ll have an adventure on the bus – I’ve been saying I wanted to check out the routes and the timing for months.

This afternoon, I will polish this ghostwriting assignment and get it out the door (I hope). If I can’t, it’s due tomorrow, so I get it out in the morning, but I’d rather do it today. I may work on the art pieces this evening, or I may do some work tomorrow, around the ghostwriting.

I need all of you to send car repair vibes that the part actually arrives so I can get the car fixed on Thursday. We are down to the wire.

Catch up tomorrow, and I’ll let you know how all the adventures went.

#art #chaos #death #freelance #frustration #mentalHealth #process #systemicFaliure #writing