The Empty PressMay 1, 2024

“Here’s a joke: why did the chicken cross the road? Answer: I have no goddamned clue because Rudy Gobert doesn’t go anywhere near any fucking birds! You write that down!”

#RaisedByWolves #mntimberwolves #AllEyesNorth #gobert #RudyGobert #H5N1 #BirdFlu #NBA #nbaplayoffs2024

https://theemptypress.com/rudy-gobert-promises-league-and-fans-he-wont-go-anywhere-near-a-glass-of-milk/

Rudy Gobert promises league and fans he won't go anywhere near a glass of milk - The Empty Press

MINNEAPOLIS – With news that traces of the H5N1 virus have been found in unpasteurised milk from infected cows, Timberwolves star Rudy Gobert has assured the NBA and its legions of fans that he has no intension of courting disaster, and will be refusing to consuming the liquid. “Look, I know what I did four […]

The Empty Press
Jon MarthalerJan 4, 2024
Whoever made the #mntimberwolves deal with the devil wrote “2023” instead of “2023-24”
Jon MarthalerJul 4, 2023

The #MNTwins have an actual rally, the #mnwild get a Dad, the #MNTimberwolves search the couch cushions, and it's time for all of us to just start watching the #StPaulSaints.

https://jonmarthaler.com/2023/07/04/minnesota-update.html

#MNastodon

Minnesota Update, 7.4.2023

There was a moment in the eighth inning of Monday’s Twins win against Kansas City when I realized what it seems like Minnesota has been missing all season.It...

Jon MarthalerApr 15, 2023
I’m happy that the #MNTimberwolves made the playoffs, but I might be even more thrilled that this means they aren’t in the lottery and have zero chance of accidentally gifting Victor Wenbanyama to Utah.
Jon MarthalerApr 15, 2023

Every #MNTimberwolves and #MNWild and playoff game is scheduled to start at 8:30pm or later, with one exception (Wild Game 4).

It's like the Central Time Zone doesn't even exist.

#MNastodon

Jon MarthalerApr 13, 2023

I’m a couple of days late to this, but:

Is the #MNLynx drafting a French center, literally two days after Rudy Gobert punched a teammate during a game, one of the all-time examples of two parts of a business not talking to each other?

#MNTimberwolves #MNastodon

Jon MarthalerApr 12, 2023

Allow me, a middle-aged Minnesota sports fan, to share some wisdom with any young people reading this:

If the Twins are playing the Yankees, or the Wolves are playing the Lakers, find something else to do with your time.

#MNastodon #MNTwins #MNTimberwolves

Jon MarthalerMar 28, 2023
I'm not saying that the #MNTimberwolves are going to win anything this year. But it does seem like, however good they might be, this could be their best chance for awhile: https://jonmarthaler.com/2023/03/28/time-is-now-for-wolves.html
It might not be the Wolves' time - but the time for the Wolves is now

Three games after Karl-Anthony Towns’s return to the Timberwolves lineup, one thing is clear: it’s time for the Wolves to win something.Note that this is a f...

Jon MarthalerFeb 16, 2023

New (non-soccer) blog: The #MNTimberwolves are saving Karl-Anthony Towns - by dooming him.

https://jonmarthaler.com/2023/02/16/timberwolves-saving-kat-by-dooming-him.html

The Wolves are saving Karl-Anthony Towns - by dooming Karl-Anthony Towns

Longtime listeners of The Sportive will know how fond I am of bringing up the case of former Timberwolf Josh Okogie. The now-24-year-old might be the single ...

Jon MarthalerFeb 14, 2023
Being a fan is so weird. Here I am tuning in to watch the #MNWild and the #MNTimberwolves despite actively expecting to not enjoy either game, and in fact, to end the evening grumpy. And yet I am genuinely excited.