For the love of everything sacred, when you put up your dating profile pics, make sure you don't look like you're smelling a fart in *all* of them.

Ask a friend if needed.

"Maybe they did ask a friend, and that friend turned out to be an enemy. Have you ever thought about that???"

No. 😭

#dating #OnlineDating #DatingPictures #SmellTheFartDating #farts

And now, Emily Post, on farts:

"Good housekeeping demands that you fold your farts neatly after usage."

This was Emily Post, on farts.

#farts #EmilyPost #housekeeping #etiquette

"I hear you're a fratboy."

"Not quite, I'm a fartboy."

#farts #frat

Here a little citation from my sister:

"We should stop calling TERFs that, and start calling them 'Feminism Appropriating Radical Transphobes', or 'FARTs', for short. Because calling a TERF feminist, is like calling Himmler a champion of tolerance and togetherness. (And is, honestly, a far more appropriate term.)"

#TERFs #FARTs #FeminismAppropriatingRadicalTransphobes #BetterWords #MySisterIsGenius

Joan Jett and the black farts...

#farts #JoanJettAndTheBlackhearts

"Captain, I detect a sudden gas emission."

"Source?"

"Give me a sec. It is coming... from the bridge."

"The bridge?"

"Yes."

"But that's not possible... unless.... someone... farted."

#StarTrek #farts

That sweet release 💨

#weirdgirl #farts #memelord #shitpost #alt

"The seats of this car are upholstered with rich Corinthian leather. How do you know it is Corinthian? Simple. Listen to the farts this leather makes as you scoot your ass across it. That's the sure sign of Corinthian leather. 😏"

#ad #marketing #farts #CorinthianLeather #leather

"I'm gonna go gas up."

"Okay."

[Later]

"[FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAART] Oops!"

"My, my, you did gas up!"

#farts #gas #OffGassing