ChaosFrom #DadSaysJokes A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in there is a dog.
It's a shitzu.
From #DadSaysJokes How did the hamburger introduce his girlfriend ?
Meat patty.
It’s been a while! from #DadSaysJokes If slow old men use walking sticks, what do fast old men use?
Hurry canes.
From #DadSaysJokes Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?
Because he had no body to go with.
From #DadSaysJokes Did you know muffins spelled backwards is what you do when you take them out of the oven?
From #DadSaysJokes I haven't seen my twin brother since I left Australia.
We were separated at Perth.
lol, just ow! From #DadSaysJokes I said to my wife "When I die," I'd like to die having sex".
She replied: "At least it'll be quick."
From #DadSaysJokes Arguing with my wife is like reading a Software License agreement.
In the end you have to ignore everything and click "I agree".
From #DadSaysJokes My house is haunted by a chicken.
A poultrygeist.
A fowl spirit.
I plan to call an eggsorcist to help it cross to the other side.
From #DadSaysJokes I tried to walk like an Egyptian and now I need to see a Cairo practor.