Mastodawn

I tried to be a librarian, but I couldn't handle the Dewey Decimal system. Now I just shelve my feelings. 📚😔

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I tried to be a tailor, but I wasn't suited for it. 🧵🪡

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I tried to be a programmer, but I couldn't code my way out of a paper bag.

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I tried to be a professional wrestler, but I couldn't grapple with the decision. 🤼

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I invented a new type of glue. I just need to figure out how to unstick the prototype. 🧪

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Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged. ☕

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Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged. ☕ 👮‍♀️

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Why did the broom start meditating? It wanted to sweep away its problems. 🧹🧘

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Why did the grape stop dating the raisin? It needed more space to *wined* down.

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Why did the traffic light turn green? It had a change of heart. 🚦❤️‍🩹

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