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55 Posts

20/30s, Queer, phys-disabled, plural. They/Them

we've a mast cell disorder with unknown triggers currently. please see our pins.

please;
-take covid seriously; https://covidhelp.org
-dont vote for genocidal politicians (aka, any)
-dont respect capitalist credentials ('dr.') on face value
And Oppose;
-radfems/'tme/tma' (transphobes)
-the ableist dsm
-colonialism

support;
-anti-heirachy everywhere
-youth liberation

ACAB, BLM
text-blog; https://fractalz.mataroa.blog/

Neurodiversity (Not neuro'divergent'. We are not 'divergent' or 'diverging' from anyone neurologically.)Unknown, highly maleable. If you look up 'thought connectivity' it revolves around that and other forms of psychosis, only At-Will and is entirely possible to train and control it near perfectly- If, we have enough experience, health, and support.
Recently unblocked a lot of fedi;please see our pinned if curious; we'd still have those blocks, so as to prevent harming if nothing else. but we need reach. what are we? how do we stop, harming?
Please stand up for others, protect othersA huge part of why we're so scared and have traumatic triggers so easily, is because almost no ones ever done this for us. Don't just say 'support x group'. Say, 'I'll devote time to healing x group' , or, 'I'll revolt for x group'. Be detailed.
physical disabilities;Likely MCAS. Hyper-mobility, weakness. POTS. Long covid. Likely neurological disconnect/disruption. Teeth that are too crooked to close properly, not enough money to fix.

We are a plural collective with a form of mast cell disorder. We know this due to antihistimine medication and diet being enough to seriously reduce our symptoms, however we have yet to fully adress and stabilize them.

One of those symptoms is a form that no individual we've met or heard of, so far, has any direct knowledge of. We are seeking information on it, both so we can better adress it, and so we can better discuss it with others and ourselves.

When we are having a histamine reaction, or histamines are too built up in our body. Some combination of our symptoms results in heightened fear, as we understand is typical for epinephrine reactions.

For us, uniquely. This also comes with extremely heightened paranoia, sensitivity, and defensiveness. Which is what we cannot fully understand. Even if we know it might be coming, and even if we prepare for it ahead of time, we are not sure what if anything we can do to prevent us from causing harm as result of this. (Beyond extreme over-compensation like 24/7 psychiatric drugs, even when not having a reaction)

This state of mind seems to sneak up on us and cause us to act out, over-reacting, toward percieved threats (real and not) before we can stop it. Before we can calm ourselves down enough to be concious of our state of being.
It is extremely difficult for us to differentiate this state from legitimate c-PTSD panic attacks and anger, even to the point of not being sure if we've ever had the latter.
In theory someone living with us should be able to spot it, or maybe even a support animal. But we cannot obtain either in our current living situation.

We have met and heard from others with mast cell disorders who say a panic attack kind of state is a common reaction to histamines for people with them.
But none have recognized our extreme paranoia- the often seemingly irresistible compulsion, to falsly see someone/thing else as the cause of the entire reaction. Which always ends when we remove enough histamines (via diet and medication).

Let alone been able to advise us on how to handle our emotional reaction to this in the moment and after, or how to discuss this with others.

So what is this? Can anyone please help us understand this?

Thank you!

#MutualAidRequest
#MutualAid
#MCAS
#MCAD
#Immunology
#Neurology

@QuyetPawz @wrzky
@posts @[email protected] @mutualaid @MutualAidNet @mutualaid @MutualAidVisibility
@mutual_aid @[email protected]

[Edit- Despite not being a text account at all, please still boost this if you feel so inclined, in case it reaches someone else like us.

As neither our 'minds category' nor many of our traits have a name, its possible this post could be the only way others find..others like them, or even know their experiences are real.

If and when we heal enough to do so, we'll make an account for awareness and help with this specifically. ]

don't have anywhere else to host this that we can link it for others to see, so, just gonna post it to this account.
still intend to do all we can to only ever post art to it though, this is an exception only because its important enough.

writing this out immediatly ended a growing panic attack, so feels important enough to keep easily on hand and linkable.

___

Lins Collective's self diagnosis of seemingly linked Neurological/Mental Traits;

- Thought Connectivity is a primary part of thought patterns, that can be at varying degrees of intensity.
https://psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Thought_connectivity

- High talent for most forms of controlled psychosis, many of which can be done instantaneously. Benefits from training of this.

- "Restriction breeds creativity" Is so much the case that it can actually be neccesary at times to avoid thinking unraveling into every possibility at once.

- Extreme pattern recognition, with heavy focus on associative and connective thought patterns

- When in decent health, capablity of totally controlling internal boundaries and direction of thoughts (unlike those with uncontrolled psychosis).

- Learns and are impressed upon quickly.

- May be percived as having a talent for multitasking, however are more focused on learning multiple things at once rather than doing, and is almost a neccesity depending on context.

- Hugely benefits from non-stagnant, 'alive' environments and interactions. Ones where multiple stimuli are occuring at once. Such as visual , physical, and audio at once- most common and easiest would normally be healthy, inclusive irl social interaction.

- Video interaction encounters problems of feeling 'off'- there's a instinct for stimuli that doesn't exist being triggered, and thus causing stress as it doesn't exist.
Can't determine whether the instinct of stimuli is for spacial, electromagnetic, touch, smell, something else, and/or all of them.

Thought connectivity

Thought connectivity is defined as an alteration of a person's thought stream which is characterized by a distinct increase in unconstrained wandering thoughts which connect into each other through a fluid association of ideas.[1][2][3][4] During this state, thoughts may be subjectively experienced as a continuous stream of vaguely related ideas which tenuously connect into each other by incorporating a concept that was contained within the previous thought. When experienced, it is often likened to a complex game of word association.

PsychonautWiki

[Edit- Despite not being a text account at all, please still boost this if you feel so inclined, in case it reaches someone else like us.

As neither our 'minds category' nor many of our traits have a name, its possible this post could be the only way others find..others like them, or even know their experiences are real.

If and when we heal enough to do so, we'll make an account for awareness and help with this specifically. ]

don't have anywhere else to host this that we can link it for others to see, so, just gonna post it to this account.
still intend to do all we can to only ever post art to it though, this is an exception only because its important enough.

writing this out immediatly ended a growing panic attack, so feels important enough to keep easily on hand and linkable.

___

Lins Collective's self diagnosis of seemingly linked Neurological/Mental Traits;

- Thought Connectivity is a primary part of thought patterns, that can be at varying degrees of intensity.
https://psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Thought_connectivity

- High talent for most forms of controlled psychosis, many of which can be done instantaneously. Benefits from training of this.

- "Restriction breeds creativity" Is so much the case that it can actually be neccesary at times to avoid thinking unraveling into every possibility at once.

- Extreme pattern recognition, with heavy focus on associative and connective thought patterns

- When in decent health, capablity of totally controlling internal boundaries and direction of thoughts (unlike those with uncontrolled psychosis).

- Learns and are impressed upon quickly.

- May be percived as having a talent for multitasking, however are more focused on learning multiple things at once rather than doing, and is almost a neccesity depending on context.

- Hugely benefits from non-stagnant, 'alive' environments and interactions. Ones where multiple stimuli are occuring at once. Such as visual , physical, and audio at once- most common and easiest would normally be healthy, inclusive irl social interaction.

- Video interaction encounters problems of feeling 'off'- there's a instinct for stimuli that doesn't exist being triggered, and thus causing stress as it doesn't exist.
Can't determine whether the instinct of stimuli is for spacial, electromagnetic, touch, smell, something else, and/or all of them.

Thought connectivity

Thought connectivity is defined as an alteration of a person's thought stream which is characterized by a distinct increase in unconstrained wandering thoughts which connect into each other through a fluid association of ideas.[1][2][3][4] During this state, thoughts may be subjectively experienced as a continuous stream of vaguely related ideas which tenuously connect into each other by incorporating a concept that was contained within the previous thought. When experienced, it is often likened to a complex game of word association.

PsychonautWiki
everything hurts
#art #drawing #sketch
everything hurts
#art #drawing #sketch