lifewithtreesNo matter what I’m doing I take too long.
Or too short
Or it’s just right and then it sets a standard as if I know what I’m doing.
Fellow ADHDers - How do you deal with your time blindness?
@actuallyadhd an example, here’s some strategies in an adhd blog and there is so much text and steps and blah blah blah that I can’t even begin to digest it https://www.simplypsychology.org/adhd-time-blindness.html
ADHD & Time Blindness
Time blindness refers to a consistent difficulty sensing, tracking, and estimating time. It’s as if the internal clock many people rely on runs differently—or barely runs at all. For someone with ADHD, minutes can feel like seconds or stretch into hours. This disconnect makes it incredibly hard to plan, prioritize, and transition between tasks.
Aegir@lifewithtrees Feels like that article was written by someone in hyperfocus ha! I use timers a lot for things like cooking. For other things I’ve got used to doing everything as fast as possible so it’s done and out of the way before I get distracted. I’m always early for everything, sometimes by hours, because I’ve had some severe rage/judgemental responses from family members for being late before.
@aegir I get that!
I’m having a hard time accepting I need to live my life by timers. It makes me feel broken and anxious, so I resist using them and then the issue reoccurs.
Sounds like I need to push through the feelings and accept I need help and that it’s ok.
Like I’d feel like it’s ok for anyone else to use them. Did/do you feel shame or anxiety for actively living with timers?
@lifewithtrees I’ve never had shame for using timers or other assistive technology, more a sense of relief it exists. I had lots of shame for seemingly never been able to meet people’s standards, they all ‘know time’ and I could never get it, and it was always my fault, some moral failing (hey, this is my family. Now I have calendar reminders and timers and it’s an effective ‘neurotypical mask’ 🙄
@aegir it sounds like, I’m learning in real time, internalized ableism.
https://www.7cups.com/advice/article/recognizing-and-overcoming-internalized-ableism
It mentions how it shows up in families here too. I have a parent who is a “should-er” for instance, who I think also shoulds themselves to “power through”
@lifewithtrees Internalised ableism is exactly what it is. Fortunately now I’m a lot kinder on myself, and the timers thing/etc is something I need to reduce friction with the allistic world.
@aegir I love that you explained it as a way to reduce friction with the allistic world. The issue sits with a world that is organized in a way that is not accessible. It’s not a personal failing.
Similar to how it’s not the homosexuality that’s the problem, it’s the homophobia.