Eagle Tactical is proud to introduce CamoChips, the most tactical of all potato-based snacks. Forged in a top-secret military lab, CamoChips contain 110% of the nutrition a manly man of manliness requires to execute any mission. Infused with massive amounts of creatine, protein, and testosterone, CamoChips will turn you into the most dominant of all males in your group. Get yours today!

#EagleTactical

[Avoid touching anyone for 1 day after consumption]

Inspired by,

https://snac.9front.club/thedaemon/p/1774989154.745590

thedæmon (Clay Ayers) [he / him] (@[email protected])

144 following, 173 followers · I cannot make this shit up: There are Camouflage Potato Chips in the vending machine.

snac.9front.club
@GayDeceiver Do they come in vanilla and bubblegum flavour?

@DamonHD

Asking the real questions, right here.

@GayDeceiver

@ParadeGrotesque @GayDeceiver It's called leadership...

(Wash your hands carefully after contact.)

@GayDeceiver Just had something delish from Trader Joe’s that might fit the profile, a Korean fried seaweed & sticky rice snack chip, very camo looking. Extreme deliciousness.
@wendinoakland that does sound pretty yummy.
@GayDeceiver They’re just an eensy bit sweet, so yeah, perfect.
@wendinoakland @GayDeceiver I need the vanilla and testosterone combo hit NOW else the vein in my temple will throb ... and I'll scweem and scweem until I'm sick...
@GayDeceiver theyre also not cooked in seed oils. thats important.
@emily_rugburn @GayDeceiver surely it's a blend of meat fat and nut oil
@kinsale42 @GayDeceiver oh no. those seed oils make men less manly. the head of hhs said so.
Kennedy and influencers bash seed oils, baffling nutrition scientists

Seed oils have been the focus of fiery critics from internet influencers to high-profile politicians like HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. They claim that these oils pressed from the seeds of certain plants are toxic to human health and fueling high rates of chronic diseases like obesity and diabetes. Kennedy has called for a return to the use of fats such as beef tallow for frying. Such claims have exasperated nutrition scientists, who say decades of research have confirmed the health benefits of consuming such oils, especially when compared to sources such as butter or lard.

AP News

@GayDeceiver I'm so neaky even my chip bag is camouflaged. Nobody will know I'm here

CRINKLECRINKLECRINKLECRINKLE

crunch crunch

Mmm, covert and savoury

CRINKLECRINKLECRINKLE

crunch crunch

No one will ever suspect my presence

@dragonfrog @GayDeceiver WHOS EATING THOSE CHIPS
@dragonfrog @GayDeceiver the real trick is to cough really loud when you open the bag.
@GayDeceiver
The only chip with more than one potato per chip!

@GayDeceiver Your joke is more coherent than the original. I’m reading the words on this bag and I cannot understand what they mean:

RAYS
MOSSY OAK
OBSESSION
ALL DRESSED
FLAVORED

If you gave someone those words and asked “what product do these describe?” they would never say “potato chips.”

“In a blind taste test, 9 out of 10 consumers preferred flavored over unflavored potato chips.”