Because mastodon is like a 99% male audience, I will say this: if you have an aging mother you are in relationship with and care about, do NOT make her go through medical stuff alone. I am skilled & mean enough to fight through medical stuff and even so you would not believe how bad it is. Just accept that you cannot imagine.

I talk to a lot of people's aging moms and they are abandoned & alone even in nice families. I don't care how awkward it is, you have to try to ask them about it.

Our moms are suffering because no one cares and they aren't telling anyone. They're getting diagnoses 15 years late, they're being bullied about medications, they're silent about what they're going through.

The difference between the younger women and the older women in the patient groups I'm in is horrific. I have listened to many, many people's moms describe years of suffering that could've been prevented. I am not trying to lay on any guilt. I'm just saying a little bit could go a long way.

It doesn't have to be this way. I have helped multiple older women argue to get past primary care and get to specialists and learn that there is better science than decades ago, that has studied more women, but there's only one of me in these chats. You can't fix the system but if you have an older woman in your life you can ask if you can research something for them, or go to an appointment and make sure they're heard, or suggest the random pains they have are a thing that needs attention.
@grimalkina May I ask about which country you speak?
@NatureMC no you may not. I have family in multiple countries and this is a theme across all of them. I think you are capable of generalizing from one person's narrative in a specific context and adapting it to your own.

@grimalkina That's ok! 👍 Your answer shows me that it doesn't seem to be a problem of one country only despite the very different health care systems in the world.

(I first read your post connected to a certain health care system.)