Woozle Hypertwin

I just figured out a lovely little #ADHD brainmine / self-gaslighting that I've been doing.

You know how in order to get yourself to do something difficult, ADHD means you have to find a way to feel enthusiastic about it, right?

Extensive childhood training, however, will always remind me that if I feel like I want to do something, it's "playing", and I really should be doing my work (i.e. something else).

Therefore: by the time I psych myself into doing something I don't really want to do, I feel guilty and anxious about it because I should really be doing something else.

Mar 17 at 2:57pmWeb
Show threadPetra5d ago

@woozle

Oh.

Well damn!

Show threadManic Emo Dream Ghoul5d ago
@woozle I have such an oppositional defiant brain that it's getting to the point that if I want to do something but I also need to do it, the oppositional defiance kicks in and I juse don't do it. Which is great, because I now stopped eating because my brain decided to be oppositional defiant about SHIT IT NEEDS TO STAY ALIVE
Show threadWoozle Hypertwin5d ago

@BigShellEvent My inner intuition about that says your inner oppositionally-defiant-self is angry about something, and that figuring out what it's angry about might help. Or might not. (Random-thots-R-us, no extra charge.)

When I stop eating, fwiw, it's more along the lines of "I don't deserve to eat" or "I'm too far behind on Important Things to have time for eating" or "I don't feel like going to the trouble; eating is kinda boring and not worth the effort".

Anyway: [sympathy]

Show threadManic Emo Dream Ghoul5d ago
@woozle I know exactly what it's angry about tbh. I actually respect that, all my cells are on strike right now because the working condition in this body is unacceptable. Which, tbh. Mad props to them.
Show threadRead along with Matt5d ago
@woozle oof owie ouch (me too)
Show threadspanghero5d ago
@woozle I think I may have heard a penny drop in the Spanghero house. Need to chew that one over.
Show threadGreen screen background5d ago
@woozle clever!
Show threadCynAq🤘5d ago
@woozle holy moly, you just explained my life 😱
Show threadSinnamon (despicable arc 😈)5d ago
@woozle This quite aligns with the theory of "the best way to stop procrastinating something boring is to have something even more boring to do instead (so the procrastination of the very boring task is the normal boring task)". Makes sense!
Show threadDrew 🇵🇭 ♾️5d ago

@woozle

Oof.

Yes.