When women have a crush on men

https://lemmus.org/post/20701572

men are discouraged from approaching women and women dont want to show their interest in clear way. How have we not gone extinct yet?

We are on the way. sex and relationship rates are massively declining for Gen Z.

I have four newphews 16-20. they have all dated. all but one of them has already sworn off dating because they think it’s total bullshit and they thought it was miserable and no fun to have a girlfriend.

Damn.

15 bikes an hour is really fucking impressive, no what what kind of bikes.

Right, depending on the margins, he could probably make good money selling those bikes.
Brother, if you think this is a one-way thing, you are profoundly mistaken
sorry, do men dog pile on their friends girlfriends for not buying them nice enough gifts? or not giving him enough blowjobs?
Please, do not go down this road. Are you really going to argue that our society does not put unrealistic expectations on women?
No, I’d argue that women who think that way are simple choosing to be miserable and making excuses for it. And that’s their choice.
And I’d argue you’re going full speed down the incel slope, and that’s your choice.

I’ve slept with dozens of women. How am I an incel?

I just think women are accountable for themselves and their choices, like all adult human beings. I guess that is incel speak to you? Because what, you believe women are helpless victims of an evil society that forces them to do things they don’t want to do?

So you’re not an incel. You’re just an ignorant prick. Gotcha. It truly is sad how full of yourself you are, yet all of this is a vast amount of nothingness.

If you were truly interested in the subject, you’d educate yourself. There are enough studies in psychology and sociology available for free that proves you wrong before you even finish the abstract.

Have a nice day.

Nobody is forcing women to get lip injections. They do that themselves.

The incel slope does seem to have a lot more members lately, whether due to social media or guys bitter from failed relationships, bit I will note that there’s an old adage that still often rings true

“Men will fight each other physically sometimes to the point of bloodshed, but women will tear each other down socially without mercy”

Where are you finding these women? I’ve never dated anyone like that. Not disputing that they exist, but to take out enough of them that it’s worth bitching about online may indicate a problem with the choices you’re making. Plenty of women are looking for an actual connection and relationship with someone.

they are the majority of the single women in my city in their 30s, on dating apps and in real life. They choose me, i don’t choose them.

The women I am interested in aren’t usually single. So unless I start an affair or poach someone’s wife, I can only date the women who are single who are like this.

I try to date outside of my city, but women in the suburbs usually even worse and they are usually conservative Trump types.

And all of us agree the issue is women’s expectations they get from social media

Yikes. Sounds like you’re all single for good reasons.

You’re kinda down to the dregs when you get to your thirties, the nice ones have all paired up by that point.
I’m in my 30s and I don’t feel that way at all. Yeah, there’s lots of shitty people or ones I don’t vibe with but that’s been the case my whole life. Many of the ones that I’d have considered a poor match in my early 20s have matured since then into much more likable people. If you’re using dating apps though, you are probably going to get more exposure to the dregs. One of many reasons I don’t touch those. You can still meet people the old fashioned way by going out and doing things. You may not find someone as quickly but you’re not getting constant negativity thrown in your face.

dating in my early 30s was great. once i got past 35 thought, it all went to shit. 9/10 dates i meet now give me this long premable about how their exes all sucked and i better be better than them. it’s insane. like they will approach me at a bar/event and just start ranting at me.

and the 1/10 one that doesn’t… has never dated and has basically no adult life experience. i did go out with a nice lady last month… but she was had zero real life experience and I’m not interested in that either.

every normal, happy, well adjust woman I meet is already married. that includes all my female friends over the years. the funny part is they are so chill you don’t even know they are married because they don’t really talk about their SO at all… because they are their own person and don’t have a partner who defines them and from which they derive their worth and self esteem… and if you flirt with them they just point it out and it’s no big deal.

Many will have married already, so choices when I was in my 30’s tended to be:

  • Somebody who didn’t marry because they really were careful about who they want to date or settle down with. This could be fine, but could also mean unrealistic expectations or some issue that hadn’t worked through previously (I was in the latter boat)
  • Somebody who married and divorced, possibly due to a relationship that went bad. They may be the cause of that, the victim of it, or other circumstances. Increased chance of kids and ex issues
  • Married but the spouse passed away (30+ is increased chances for previously unknown medical issues to crop up, it just a car accident)
  • Somebody who didn’t have it together enough (in their mind) to even consider relationships. Could have been persuing a career or took a bit to get past the “wild party” stage
  • Immigrants. People who worked to get out of one country and to another and relationships weren’t in the cards yet. There can be possible language/cultural miscommunication hurdles (including different social cues)

I wouldn’t say it’s the dregs. Just that one’s choices have changed a lot from “the one a couple houses/lockers down from you”.

I guess it’s a blessing in disguise because now it will be easier to detect people who are not worth dating
it’s not. it means we all suffer because so many of us want to be in happy relationships but the toxic bullshit people believe is totally preventing that.
Just explain them their use of fallacies is wrong and communication is key as then maybe they will reconsider their ideas. If they don’t then you dodged a bullet especially in the long term
It’s not new. My cousin constantly argued with her boyfriend 20-25 years ago because she believed she deserved to be taken out to $200 dinners on a regular basis, and he only ever wanted to go to McDonald’s.
Won’t be long til they can compromise on that one with the way things are going.
Because the internet isn’t real life and plenty of people know how to talk to people, including those of the opposite sex.

Fun story: this guy I know on my gaming Facebook group would complain about being single. This was an older men’s group/dad group. He’d repeat whatever the manosphere would say and ask for validation, and we (usually married dudes) usually say things like, “Yeah man dating is hard” and “women give mix signals”.

Finally, mods called out how his last 10+ posts were complaining and his shitty attitude is just sucking the energy out of the group. They warned him that if he kept it up, they’d ban him from the group until he fixed his behavior.

Fast forward to today - he’s telling us about his new girlfriend he met on NYE and how they had valentine’s dates. He shared how after that post, he took a long look at himself and stopped sabotaging himself.

That isn’t as true as you think. Communication is often the weakest part of any relationship (romantic, platonic, professional).

Everyone has their own language and very few people are willing to adapt to someone else’s way of communicating, even when that effort should be mutual.

I think that’s true today. When I was younger it def felt like people, of any gender, were more willing to try and understand other people.
let me see: 99.9% of interactions man-woman are started by man right?
We make for it with ✨horny✨
We slowly are, most western countries have a birth rate below what we need to maintain the population.
That’s for economic reasons that have nothing to do with gender issues.
Nah, it’s a mixture of both.
No, it’s not. Many studies have confirmed this. Do your research.
Yes it is, studies have confirmed it.

It’s not economic, as much as people like to believe.

Even socially democratic utopias like Norway ,which have such massive sovereign funds that their citizenry don’t need to work a day in their lives, have a population birth crisis.

In Norway, housing costs have skyrocketed like in the rest of the rest of the western world. This plays a significant role in the decline of birth rates. Also, as populations increase in wealth and education, birth rates tend to go down, because parents prioritize focusing on fewer children rather than having more to support an agrarian economy. It is economy-driven. The effects on female empowerment are interwoven with that. Women tend to do better in better economies, because better economies focus more on service industries rather than material ones, which favor women over men.