Randahl FinkMar 8

Just what the climate needed — setting Tehran's oil storage facilities on fire.

I am standing in my kitchen, sorting the trash into four different containers, because my country wants the planet to survive; meanwhile Trump and Putin have decided that the planet will not be needed after they are gone.

Show threadmaterializing variationsMar 8
@randahl No better way to get funding to SpaceX for off-planet colonization than making this one uninhabitable
Show threadmike805Mar 9
@catscatscats @randahl If Elon Musk wants to go to Mars, he should bring Zuckerberg, Bezos, Gates, George Soros, the Koches, and the entire British Royal Family. They can finally have their own planet.
Show threadmaterializing variationsMar 9
@mike805 @randahl If we're making a list, there's a set of government files with a bunch of names I'd like to add
Show threadmike805
@catscatscats @randahl They can go on the second boat. Billionaires first. There is land to grab!
Mar 9 at 4:16amWeb
Show threadmaterializing variationsMar 9
@mike805 @randahl brb, drafting a bill to require that it be done on horseback using tiny flags.