This whole surprise mandatory royal archetype is actually the worst thing. Now everytime I get someone, I have to look up a guide, which usually gives me spoilers of other future archetypes, which are the sort of thing that I want to have the joy of discovering myself. It's not like wait until midgame and all are unlocked is plausible, as the game expected you do somehow know exactly what route to take 100 hours before telling you it's a thing.

Not saying it ruined the game but, it kinda did.

I swear bonding for rank among your party members is basically guide dammit because you physically can't find any of them. -_-

How to play a Persona game.

Boss: 9999HP, 2x adds 5000HP each
Must kill adds or wipe
Killed add, got one hit on boss
Adds regenerate
Grind for an hour
Boss at 100 HP, surprise cutscene fully heals the boss

Games like this don't need an "easy mode", because easy mode is only mildly less tedious. It needs a walk simulator mode. As in removing the gameplay altogether would've been an improvement.

Now something Atlus/SMT excels at: monster design in the pure aesthetics kind of way. You'd think I've seen all there is to be seen, but without fail every boss ever in any SMT and derivatives are just a different magnitude of brilliant.

The narratives... This is a Persona game. As in I remember Persona fondly but in a "I liked it but I just couldn't love it" kind of way. Here is that again, it almost always touches something unique and interesting but always backs off the last second. Which is very different to SMT main lines, I only played IV and it broke me in ways no other fictions ever did and I couldn't touch another one. And I played it pre Trump.

With monster aesthetic designs, I frequently feel "this is cool", but Persona/Metaphor kind of, "holy shit what is this I'm looking at? How? Even... What?!" Almost never happens.

This is my holy grail of monster aesthetic design. I don't want to describe them because the impact of seeing them is the point.

That demon baby fight is so tedious that Yuffie felt sorry for me and presented me her cat bum.

I'm only partially joking when I say that I'm so fucked in life that I'm thinking about just do a hyperspecialised degree in videogames monster aesthetics design*.

The monster designs here. This is the level I want to eventually achieve.

(*Yes it's a thing. Yes I know you don't need a degree for that shit. I have this formative-years acquired mental illness called raised as Traditional Asian, and all my rebellion went to the oppositional defiant queer with lifestyle of an ibis going through trash cans thing. Academic external validation is something I lost my battle on not giving a shit over, normal people don't even need to have this issue)

Yeah you know that one time I nearly became a body piercer in 2024 but then I realised I had to actually talk to people so I didn't
Please give me a spin off that's just hanging out with my best brother

I get that Bardon is a really nice bro who genuinely cares, and as a command he kept on closing wall holes instead of commanding, which in a village of like four people it works, and I love him for it and all

But I was not expecting how literal the supportive Commander weapon is a floor mop

I support you with my mop!

That is the real deal, folks. None of that hero fantasy shit. Don't fight for me I can fight for myself. Please mop for me, you have no idea how incompetent I am at mopping

Anyone else feel like, all Persona somehow made mobs way more fun than all bosses, from strategic perspective? Mobs are all about finding out weaknesses and work on that. Bosses are like that too but an hour long cycling through the same three commands once you know the elementals.
Leon Strohl has all the characteristics of someone I'd deeply respect and admire, and I sort of do, I just don't _like_ him which makes me feel guilty.

It's worrying that I like Louis more than just about anyone else going after the throne at this moment. Especially way more than any of the hereditary royals.

Catherina is cool. Clueless but cool

I have to Guide Dammit here more than any other games, specifically because the game doesn't know how to communicate anything well, and punishes you for it.

Is "Mausoleum" the same as "Catacomb"? Not telling. You can enter and find out. Congrats you lost a full day. Now try a different location that may or may not be "Mausoleum" as I've unlocked multiple tombs already. Congratulations you have timed out, game over.

Hoooo boy. The three turns against individual commanders on Louis's boat is by far the best battles. Snappy. Strategy. Boom boom.
Oh Bardon, he got voluntold as the mayor and now is imposter syndrome hard. Which tbh, I think he'd make a terrible large city mayor, but that village has like seven people. Fence up the cliff and he's do fine.

The team I want: Neuras, Catherina, that super helpful decaying Tooth.

The team I got: Strohl, Hulkenberg, Heismay.

I don't really dislike anyone in my party. I wish them the best, just I don't vibe with any of them either.

We all know Neuras is my long lost brother, when we see him with his wings tied around his waist like a mildly inconvenient jacket.
I see why Gallica is meant to be protagonist's lifelong best friend but you are not allowed to soul link with her until the plot progresses. Mages are already broken as it is. Just turn up with a bunch of mages and burn everything down, basically.

I'm worried that my team won't make it to the next destination after this food poisoning.

Especially considering this is kinda you know, Heismay's sons state.

Your elf: tall thin long eared waify fragile mages, who only drink the most vegan dews

Our elf: tall thin long eared brutes leaving elf shaped holes on walls, currently eating chunks of dry wall between bites of rotten possum remains

I really don't know how will Metaphor handle later phase added team members. Re-levelling their Archetypes feels like a special grind hell. I also don't really like any of my current team members to want to be stuck with them.
I swear to fuck I just turn up to every location with worst possible weather. As if I'm not already doing that irl.
Oh no protagonist accid made Lina quit. And she's the only person I super like.
Gallica is weirdly chill about returning to ruined Gracia Forest where her people were force displaced. Meanwhile Heismay considers this is his perfect platform to Well Actually It's Kinda Close to My Village like read the room.

Brigitta is such a miserable lonely git, but also she's by far the easiest to bond with for that reason. But also her class is essentially useless. And she's just so so punchable. The peak Elon Musk who camps on Reddit kind of punchable.

Metaphor needs an option of doing whatever the NPCs want to do to others back to them. She's not even useful to me lol.

I'm now wondering if Gallica is trying to secretly fuck everyone over. She's always selectively helpful, weirdly indifferent about everything, and honestly most camel herders treat her camels with more genuine friendship than the protagonist with her.
HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAH THAT WING SURFING SEGMENT HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAH I don't know if this is meant as slapstick comedy, but I'm convinced everyone learnt the mechanics by falling into their death within five seconds on first attempt.

I'm at the Soiree and it's suddenly becoming quite interesting.

Junah is implied will be a party member. So we have a One Race Per Character party most likely. We are a fox missing and a third eye person missing so far. Hope it's Catherina.

Speculation:

Elda: lol there's only one
Clemar: Leon
Roussainte: Hulkenberg wait does she have a first name
Eugief: Heismay
Nidia: Junah???
Paripus: Catherina???
Ishkia: My precious brother in spirit Neuras
Rhoag: ???
Mustari: ???
Fairy: Gallica

They are all pretty shit to goblins and ogres tbh

No like seriously something is not right with Gallica. She's not livetweeting all the confidential stuff only because there are no internet in that verse.
I cannot believe this party. If they had any spare cash they would've hired bards to sing about how they want to assassinate Louis. While pretending to be working for Louis during the most sensitive election cycle.
I'm so proud of protagonist, who washed for the first time on 13th August. I think the game started on 1st of June.
It just occurred to me. Geographically the three country kingdom is Australia shaped. Virgas Island is Tasmania.
Masked Dancer will either turn out to be a super interesting class, or will just need re-equip between every encounter and becomes too tedious to use.

Metaphor is doing that ridiculous thing like Clair Obscur where the "difficulty" is it gives you turn icons then refuse to respect it.

This is so old. Try something more inter, like every time the players almost won a fight, delete the game off the console mid battle. Also irritating and petty shit over fairness, but at least interesting.

That octopus fight is the worst of going out of turn I've ever seen.

Enemy starts with two turns. It howls and gains four. Then between each it gets a free AoE raid wide without using a turn icon. Then because it's series of random hits there will be one Crit, which generates another free turn icon. So each "two turn icons" is really 15 back to back turns from the enemy, that's completely not communicated, that no one can survive through.

Just remove turn icons completely if games don't want to honour this shit.

Turn based JRPG folks
Just arrived to Virgas Island as invading imperialists. It's 41C. I hope the party dies of exposure.

Something I'm super glad about Metaphor, is it uses regional accents, but not assigning them with an assumed real world culture with weird stereotypes.

FFXIV was doing well until it decided that it needed fantasy Mongolia and fantasy South America etc. The fantasy Poland in 2.0 that's mostly Arab aesthetics felt way less pointed.

Ok fine I am a little sad that a certain lordling didn't turn up with full scale circa 2000s Mockney, mostly because how jarring it would be in the sense of, drill it in this isn't fantasy UK.

I'm at the cultural imperialists has to imperialism part.

But can I say that the second Voice of Cards is the best narrative regarding to this specific subject matter in video games. By a long shot. None of the weak sauce like FFX or Tales of Symphonia. Fujiko F Fujio also did really well on his soft scifi manga one shot.

I still maintain that Voice of Cards is the best Yoko Taro series.

Are we not gonna address this whole, the Metaphor verse's instability may have something to do with their cost of living with food? An ingredient that costs 10000 coins in the context that a starter sword costs like 1000? And that's one ingredient you can't even eat.

Let's get ready to dungeon crawl!
> Arrive to dungeon

Let's enter the dungeon!
> Scottish fold's foot got infected

Let's go home!
> Never knew what the dungeon look like roflmao

I just arrived to abandoned Shinjuku and literally what the fuck

I was not expecting to be caught with the same plot twist again, given how much both Monster Hunter and SMT IV wtf'd me good.

Junah is alright. Pleasant enough person. Useful skills. But every time Protagonist hangs out with her, she just... Sings. Which leaves me no choice but to throw myself overboard.
They found this in the underground ?trainstation of post apocalyptic Shinjuku. Anyone have the heart to tell them it's a disposable vape?
I'm not sure if I'm having a super bad run, or Shinjuku station has a particular shit design. There are absolutely no magla hollows past the one in entrance, as in nothing for hours at a time. It got so stupid that the best strategy now is intentionally run into all humans, escape the battle; and if any accidental mimicks shut the game and reload.
I'm also not super keen on how the mandatory social link from More has to be about levelling up the most useless class. What do you even do with merchant.
I feel like, every fabric outfit so far, from party members to random women in the capital, are just bits of curtains bought off Ikea and sewn together. Highly stylish, in a I don't know what to say kind of way.

Years ago, the place I worked at had a door issue. As in the glass door will not open. We left a fridge next to it, if there's a fire the idea is shut your eyes and smash the door with the fridge and escape.

Anyway that was how I ran through that Shinjuku stage. I had no MP left after like 3 fights.

Um so at the Virgas Island part, I think it might accidentally be a me problem rather than a game problem. I went into Shinjuku way too early, and now I'm blastering through all the optional dungeons. As if I were the fridge in the above mentioned fridge-glassdoor situation.

Not that I'm projecting my real life issues into this or anything.

I usually just turn up to all the optional dungeons regardless of the weather, as at this point it kinda doesn't matter. But 47C during a heatwave? Fuck no I'm escaping back to Trad where it's 15C and gonna do... public speaking or something instead.

"Here, honoured foreign guests! Before you leave, try our culturally significant rare fruit. We won't tell you that you'd be tripping balls on them. Enjoy the immediate long trip while operating an experimental vehicle on open sea while fucked out of your head!"

That's one way to take out the invading colonists I suppose.

And Altabury Heights main street is Melbourne CBD?

Junah is a technical singer who sounds like exactly why I can't listen to classic radio anymore. The vocal quality feels like my ear drums being sanded down with a dental drill.

I have no idea what happened in the cut scene of opera assassination. My ears were too tortured for that.

Ahhh, a fuck the right off battle where there's a distinctive status makes the entire fight over the top in length and irritation, but just have the plot point that prevents your team from being able to prepare for any of them.

Do I want to restart the game so I just happened to have 6 anti-frostbite gear for this one Rella battle?

Hell no.

When a fight is so absurd that immediately you just skip every scene so you can save and you never have to suffer that again.

I'm sure it's moving and plot important and blah blah blah but that was a horrible bottleneck, and at least here the scene isn't worth it

Unfortunately the backlog only goes so far. I guess I'll never know wtf is Rella's deal. Except that I'm absolutely not suffering that fight ever again
I really like the brothers. Probably the only party members I really truly felt affection toward.
@BigShellEvent definitely not just you. It's the one dungeon I vividly remember for being extremely annoying, and it also drags forever! And it feels worse because the Shinjuku reveal was one of the plot highlights but they drop in the middle of this awful dungeon
@uncoolmouse As in, I'm so fascinated by the plot and I also extremely cannot be bothered
@BigShellEvent omg I never played SMT IV or Monster Hunter, but this is the Etrian Odyssey thing I was talking about!

@uncoolmouse so MonHun is particularly odd, as in you discover this massive post apocalyptic hyper scifi aspect of the verse... And immediately it went back to however we act when people found out dinosaurs have feathers. Like who cares we have lives to live.

You should play MonHun. Quality cats.

@uncoolmouse SMT IV on the other hand. I'm saying this as a compliment. If you didn't start the game with clinical depression, you will be by the end of it. The mood is not like Persona or Metaphor
@BigShellEvent CATS!? You said cats?! Okay I'm intrigued now. I thought the game was all about giant beasts.