Urban HermitDec 19

#ActualyAutistic

You know, I am going through some stressful things right now, have opted into living with a friend and his family for reasons, and frequently have to retreat from people. But their kids don't trigger me. Neither do their animals.

What is your theory why? I would really like to hear what other people think, or if this is not a universal experience? Is there an age where it wears off?

Show threadšŸ”„CassandrašŸ”„Dec 20
@Urban_Hermit I would guess you don't feel the same pressure around them. They may be more accepting than adults tend to be.
Show threadKevin DavyDec 20
@Cassandra @Urban_Hermit
I think it's because they have no hidden expectations. What you see is what you get.
Show threadUrban HermitDec 20

@pathfinder @Cassandra agreed. Big contrast. It is funny though, that means that if we were all as transparent as kids we might all get along easier.

Maybe I should watch the movie The Invention of Lying. I have been putting it off, but maybe there will be an analogy in there that is relevant.

I wonder when kids go 'bad'? Is it biological, or cultural?

Show threadKevin DavyDec 20
@Urban_Hermit @Cassandra
At a guess I would say cultural. The moment they realise that appearance is more important in their world than reality.
Show threadšŸ”„CassandrašŸ”„
@pathfinder @Urban_Hermit I would also say cultural. Otherwise the assumption is that people are inherently bad?
Dec 20 at 1:32pmWeb
Show threadLynn McAlister UE  Dec 20
@Cassandra @pathfinder @Urban_Hermit It's also true that you do find people who maintain these what-you-see-is-what-you-get characteristics. So it's not only cultural, but also probably individual. Some people are just never convinced by the 'appearances matter most' idea - or can't find the energy to live that way.
Show threadUrban HermitDec 20

@lmgenealogy @Cassandra @pathfinder I think I could almost mask all the time, but just like lying, it doesn't feel like it is worth the energy to maintain and life even as I am now makes me tired.

And being a good masker, or liar, is a lot of mental hard work. It involves maintaining an entire separate reality in your head where things with insufficient evidence to be self supporting are called true. And then frequent talking to try to support the illusion.

No wonder NTs are paranoid.

Show threadLynn McAlister UE  Dec 20
@Urban_Hermit @Cassandra @pathfinder I just can't do it. People are always surprised by the things I say, but most of them cope pretty well once they get used to me.