olena

Maybe it is actually #alexithymia speaking, but I am pretty sure I can’t feel hate.
Like, I can feel despise, disgust, loathe, horror, fear etc - but hate? Hate assumes certain amount of passion, strength - it’s something too big to bother to maintain for someone you don’t like.

Maybe it’s just my #autistic negation to use definitive labels - like the hesitancy to consider what I can feel ‘love’ or to call someone a friend.

@autistics
#neurodivergent
#autism
#AuDHD

Oct 16, 2025 at 8:28amWeb
Show threadDaniM Oct 16, 2025

@olena @autistics

+1

I also experience this with rage or anger.
I ‘feel’ indignation, but not as an emotion or physical state, rather as a logical conclusion. I can feel frustration, very rarely irritation, and I can be cynical. But rage or anger? No.

Show threadolenaOct 16, 2025
@MeerJetzt @autistics yesss! Exactly! I don’t feel either of those, even though other people sometimes would misinterpret my attempts to explain myself as anger
Show threadPatternChaserOct 16, 2025

@olena @autistics Yes, especially to the last bit. 👍

Love and friends are ... difficult. 🤷‍♀️😐

Show threadKevin DavyOct 16, 2025
@olena @autistics
Beyond the fact that many of us have learnt to control and hide our emotions because they don't fit, or aren't seen as the right way of being able to feel. I also think it's because we struggle with the descriptions themselves.
Either they don't adequately embrace the complexity of them. Or used more generically, for example I love bread, they aren't accurate or feel appropriate. Rather like lying.
Show threadolenaOct 16, 2025
@pathfinder @autistics yes, and for things like love or friendship there are so many definitions(and sometimes contradictory) that I feel like any feelings of mine are not enough. Not up to expectations. Not what that HIGHLY NOBLE WORD supposes. You know what I mean? Like, if you don’t sacrifice yourself- it’s not love, if you’re not always with them knowing everything about them - it’s not friendship etc. I kinda understand the absurdity of the absolutism of those statements, but can’t help but judge myself with them.
Show threadKevin DavyOct 16, 2025
@olena @autistics
They are frameworks designed for those who feel and experience things in ways that we don't, or can't. It's no wonder really that many of us struggle with them.