VerityFairI think I've finally accepted that I may be too soft for a career in #tech. And that's okay. For me, it's not because I'm intellectually incapable of the job; it's that many who are drawn to this field unfortunately do not know what to do whenever emotions or #mentalhealth become a factor. I'm #AuDHD and very sensitive, and I've also realized recently that I've been in #audhdburnout since entering #college in 2021. I did manage to graduate earlier this year (magna cum laude to boot!), but it honestly beat the shit out of me. Between the price tag of US college and how miserable I was towards the last half of my #CS degree, it makes me wonder if I was ever truly cut out for any of it. I did an internship, made a couple personal projects I like, and went above and beyond for course credits (partially due to being afraid of my college screwing me with those - another discussion for another day). On paper I look good for a new grad. But in reality, I'm burnt, and after graduating I proceeded to spend the summer flailing figuring out income/employment. I'm only just starting to feel like I know which direction to go. I'm very grateful that my dad lets me live with him, and has put minimal pressure on me so far to get my shit together. 1/2
I still love the subject matter of #compsci, but I realize much of the field is incompatible with my softness. And if that is the case, then I shall move to a field that understands or even appreciates all of what I can offer: both softness and intellect. 2/2
YinYin Falcon@VerityFair there should definitely corners that require both
anything tech art or UX does not work on tech alone and actually crumbles to dust without empathy for the eventual user
Alex(ithymia) 
@VerityFair Oh hey, there should be a club for this. /j
I'm in my 40s & still don't have my shit together.
I made the mistake of going to college (at the age of 40something) while undiagnosed - which means, of course, no ADD medication. What a barrel of fun that was! Let's never do that again.
I dropped out during the second year because it got too hard, and I couldn't get my head around the math. I couldn't work at the pace they wanted me to & I couldn't get tutoring, which would've been free if I had a diagnosis.
On top of that - one of my profs seemed to have a personal issue with me, but I didn't have enough evidence to report him (and he quit that year anyway, so what would be the point?). I struggled with interpersonal issues with students (not everyone gets the autism part or is willing to learn). I was way too eager to help others when I should've just kept to myself.
Ironically, my shit is more together now than it was then...
@alex I'm sorry that happened to you! Tutoring was fortunately free for all students at my college, and I think that's been becoming more common elsewhere for the reasons you just described. You don't even need to be neurodivergent to find extra academic support v helpful.
I can relate to having issues with professors/faculty too; misunderstandings around my diagnosis/experience partially led to me almost losing my internship. My school didn't want to give me course credit for the CS internship, because I had already gotten course credit on an unrelated CS project of my own. They would not make an exception even for accomodation purposes, despite having other accommodations long beforehand. Pretty much everyone thought this was some BS except for those with the power to do something. Fortunately, in my last year, the offering professor became the head of the CS Dept. and managed to finangle course codes so I could do my internship with credit. Course codes I had brought up in the past, that the prior head of CS Dept. didn't want to use -.-
Fuck the US college system. Not everyone is cut out for it. This doesn't bar you from success though; success might just come in a format that's not conventional. But sometimes that's even better despite seeming a lil weird at first 😁
@VerityFair it's been a while, lemme check...nope, still $9/hour.
Fuck the Canadian system too - at least it cost me $0...but mostly wasted my time. (it's not a complete waste if I learned a couple of things, but I wouldn't do it again)
i'm sure i will unconventionally think of something..