"Stop" - Spice Girls (rpt)
"Remember you're a womble" - The Wombles
Mumford and Sons were formed on Wimbledon Common, when Brian Mumford was around the Rushmere and invited the others to be in his band.
Here's a song from the best band ever to come out of the Common.
"Destiny calling" - James
Zoe may be gorgeous, Zoe may be famous... and Radio 1 breakfast show co-host Kevin Greening is the cute one.
"Uh la la la" - Alexia
Not to be confused with dance singers like Gala, or Sabrina, or Coco.
Not to be confused with digital assistants like Skippy, Jeeves, or Nessie.
Alexia and her over-enthusiastic backing dancers look just like the front row of the crowd. Might explain who was buying this slice of sunshine.
"Breathe" - Kylie Minogue
Latest single from her "Impossible Princess" album,
The Kylie fans say that this is all about her inner calm, reserved personality, and shows her growing maturity as songwriter and producer.
I think it sounds a lot like Alisha's Attic.
"I'm ready" - Bryan Adams
About this song, Allmusic says " ". Adams has exercised his right to be forgotten, and hence is completely ignored by the leading tune site.
Is nothing preferable to whatever dull dirge Boring Bryan is boring us with? I think it is.
"Insane" - Texas
"Somebody told me that it's over", begins Sharleen Spiteri, and we've never been more thankful to hear her.
The lead side was a mash-up of "Say what you want" with "All day every day", performed at last month's BRIT awards.
"Who am I" - Beenie Man (and chart) (I think)
"It's like that" - Run DMC ft Jason Nevins
Message from Run, then video clip.
So, I bought both this and "Stop" on the day they came out. Sister was most displaeased that I hadn't picked a side. Didn't dare tell her that I'd also picked up Texas.
Episode two with Jamie Theakston, the sort of speaking clock you *can* rely on.
"My heart will go on" - Céline Dion
The Wombles were interval entertainment at the 1974 Eurovision Song Contest. Céline Dion was interval entertainment at this year's event.
Why was there a Wombles revival in 1998? There was a new animation series on ITV, and they were trying to reprise the tie-in merchandise from the mid-seventies.
"This is hardcore" - Pulp
Very much not my cup of tea, and those flashy lights are a bit much.
Can't deny that Jarvis Cocker is one of music's greatest showmen, just as Céline Dion is one of music's greatest technical singers.
"No no no" - Destiny's Child ft Wyclef Jean
M. Jean appears on the big screen, while Kelly, Michelle, Beyoncé, and Latavia sing their soulful song and do their simple dance.
Wyclef's rap was thought necessary to attract radio play and introduce the new group, but now feels completely superfluous.
Looks like they're auditioning for the new series of The Emu Show with Rod Hull and Grotbags.
"Angel street" - M People
Automatic translators of 1998 were primitive. One pop column was written in German, and the auto-translation turned this into
"Fishing-rod street" - M People
These days, CatPIG would render it as something entirely different
"Angle street" - M People ft Mc Bluebbery
"Beat goes on" - All Seeing I
Jamie, mate, if you're going to introduce the song on set, you stay on set till you're out of shot.
Good to see the Big Brother logo gets a run-out, and the lips from "Kissing with confidence".
It's all very arty, and very clever, and exactly not the sort of thing we'd expect to see at number 11.
"Here's where the story ends" - Tin Tin Out featuring Shelley Nelson
Tin Tin Out were Darren Stokes and Lindsay Edwards, top remixers in a pleasant ambient house style. (The album containing this single, "Eleven to Fly" is one of my faves.)
Shelley Nelson was the singer with Rest Assured a few weeks ago - the one that sounded like The Verve. She's still gigging.
"Let me entertain you" - Robbie Williams
Double platinum album, eh? [applauds]
Live backing vocals, live foreground vocals? Someone's cocky, someone's doing very well for himself.
A joyous romp from the biggest star of the moment. Move over, Spices, you are no longer The Biggest Thing In Pop.
Not *entirely* sure it's the brightest idea to issue the audience with trampolines, mind.
"Father" - LL Cool J (and chart)
"It's like that" - Run DMC vs Jason Nevins
Video again.
No space on this week's show for Hanson, Aaron Carter, or Dannii Minogue.
Down at number 53, "What can I do (to make you love me?)" ask The Corrs. They've been on the cusp of stardom for a couple of years, will they ever make it?
#TOTP returns at 9.45 with The Mystery Years. Miss it, miss out.
Our group declare to be true