Hello again folks
How's everyone doing?

Long post follows about why I am very stressed right now:

I am in the middle of a degree.
In April 2024 my life basically imploded and so I had to postpone my studies.

Fast forward to now and I have run out of extensions I can have and so need to finish off the stuff I was doing last year.

I have one assignment I need to enter.

It is due to be handed in by midday on Tuesday. That is only 5 days away.

Friends, I really Do Not Want to do this. My ADHD is refusing to focus on that because I discovered Blue Prince on Steam a few weeks ago and, damn, I could do an entire thesis on that!
On top of that, the study I am currently doing is intrinsically linked with the events of last year and every time I try to do any of it I am put straight back into the stress and pain of last year's grief.

I really, really need the ADHD panic focus to kick in soon.

You might reasonably ask why I don't just chuck it all in and not bother. Especially as I do not need it for work or anything like that.

Well. This is my third attempt at getting a degree. The previous attempts failed due to undiagnosed ADHD.

Getting this degree is essential for my mental health. So I can prove to myself that it's not that I'm stupid, it's that I didn't previously have the right support.

It is currently taking me about a day to write about 200 words. Yes, 200.

The other option is to just resit this particular module. Except this one module is my least favourite and worst organised of all of them. If I have to resit it, I'm not sure I will manage to go through it all again.

So yeah. Life, eh?

#study #ADHD #grief