Low Quality Facts

Elon: We need to eliminate government waste.

Advisor: We could end tax breaks for billionaires.

Elon: What about this guy here?

Advisor: That's Greg. He has to push a button every ten minutes or our nuclear warheads will detonate, killing us all. We pay him $7.25 an hour.

Elon: Fire Greg.

Mar 3, 2025 at 7:34pmWeb
Show threadK4-713 Mar 3, 2025
@lowqualityfacts Keep an eye on Greg though. He probably knows which mountain to crawl under.
Show threadFitz BushnellMar 3, 2025
@lowqualityfacts I think you need to label these as "high-quality exceptions", so people aren't taken unaware. 🙄
Show threadDJMar 3, 2025
@lowqualityfacts that was a great episode of The Outer Limits, Dead Man's Switch.
Show threadYaoi Box BalloonMar 3, 2025

@lowqualityfacts This is obviously fake.

It's not that easy to get the nukes to start flying off. This isn't a fairytale utopia where we all die in a single, blissful instant and are released from the burden of consciousness.

We're gunna suffer, long slow and hard.

Show threadMerkMar 3, 2025
@lowqualityfacts I gotta say, the “Elon fires barely-paid load-bearing employee” bit was a lot funnier when Elon was running Twitter and not the fucking US government.
Show threada fish named dog ✡️♾️Mar 3, 2025
@lowqualityfacts Kamala's plan was to change the system so the nukes don't auto-fire.
Show threadthecampbellMar 4, 2025
@lowqualityfacts this is the way EVERY business I've ever seen in this country works.
Show threadGilbert EvertonApr 11, 2025
@lowqualityfacts this is HIGH Quality right here
Show threadzendao42Apr 15, 2025
@lowqualityfacts
When do we get to fire Muskrat... out of a cannon?