OK, let's do this correctly. Please reply to this post with the ONE English word that you feel best describes JD Vance overall. Please avoid NSFW invectives.
@lauren Fascist. While the word is overused, it is completely appropriate to describe him.
@lauren Flip-flopper.

Unironically wishy-washy.

Is guyliner a word?
@lauren “Haskellish”: in the style of Eddie Haskell
or
“Smithian”: having traits of Dr. Zachary Smith
@lauren
slick (marketer / lawyer)
@lauren rat-headed weasel. (Sorry, but I couldn’t just use weasel alone - but it IS one creature at least)