Reading a thread where folk in depths of #mourning receive commiserative unresolved mourning of others as personal attacks.
This is by design. This is #GriefTaboo.
By making #grief a centering of the self, by removing mourning from the collective sphere, we rob ourselves of the tools necessary to do the work of mourning to completion, even as we reinscribe a cultural praxis of alienation of and from one another in our common mourning.
In this manner, the fetters of #tensegrity are maintained.
Having been once involved in the #NVC community, not lost on me that prohibition against empathy as sharing of commensurate stories—praxis explicitly marked out in NVC as verboten—turns out to be an especially neurotypical proscription.
Don't connect with me at a human level by sharing your heartache in harmony with my heartache—for that decenters my pain to make it about your pain—says neurotypicality.
It being inconceivable that such act could decenter us both—to make it about aching hearts.
Citation to #NVC is nonetheless useful here, for NVC sets out to be a toolset for doing the work of empathy—with an emphasis on communities of praxis.
Place to address #GriefTaboo—the normative commitment to #mourning as self-centering, thus self-ostracizing—is not in the heart of the ache.
Rather, place to address grief taboo is in our collective praxis.
Mourning is a place of power.
We need better tools to provide space for such power to manifest, thus avoid normalized depths of isolation.
Ive been following along on this and its making me misty, truly deeply
"You do you" is Eu-gen-ics.
Ciggy Bringer of Smoke