Immediately tosses all my existing subpar teapots out the window… 😢

@gedeonm I can't aim from those distances anyway, my cup is much smaller than this sink, and the tea tastes the same, I’ll pour poor, thank you.

(What is it with rating items by random criteria that barely have any effect on typical uses of an object?)

@uliwitness @gedeonm

I think there are tea ceremonies (the ringing bowl is a clue) that depend on the effect and showmanship. They are quite involved and ritualistic.

@uliwitness @gedeonm craftsmanship, personal satisfaction, the deep focus that comes with having a special interest, i can keep going.

the video is not an attack. it's okay to pour tea normal style. in fact, you can even use teabags. it's not against the law.

just watch the pretty water go bloop, you will feel better

@uliwitness @gedeonm i must insist you never watch knife-sharpening videos. if this annoys you, them shits will send you right over the edge.

they are amazing.

don't watch them.

@thegarbagebird @gedeonm Agreed on both counts. All these videos (tea and knives) are gorgeous, and I'm grateful to see them, but also, it just feels so weird that so many of them create this parallel world in which a certain criterion is so disproportionally important.
@uliwitness @gedeonm yeah, that's the hard part. the content economy rewards the game-ification of anything and everything. add to that the aspirational nature of influencers, every video can become a benchmark; why aren't your knives this sharp? why is your teapot so splashy? let me tell you about sleeping duck mattresses, they help me sleep great in between obsessively checking the lighting in my kitchen, the algorithm has decided lighting that is below 25ooo kelvins are demonetised now because someone made a joke about the desaturation in marvel films, and the AI can't tell the difference.
@uliwitness @gedeonm oooft, sorry about that. that was a lot of words to say i agree with you
@thegarbagebird @gedeonm Admittedly, as a bloody westerner, I didn't really have “tea ceremony" on my radar, thanks for pointing that out, @Chancerubbage ! Of course for stuff like that, it becomes important. The lack of context on a single social media post sometimes just draws out pet peeves and realizations about other content. So much of social media follows the capitalist line of "buy this or you won't be happy” that we see it even in things that are counter to it.
@uliwitness @gedeonm @Chancerubbage god i haven't done a proper tea ceremony in years. i should make the time.

@uliwitness

You can make it entirely westerner science nerd mindset as a study in laminar flow, which can really be quite remarkable in its properties once you have met the conditions. There are probably dozens of YouTube vids on just that aspect of water. Fluid dynamics.

And with the history of pottery and ceramics, there are some remarkable pitcher/tea pot designs that whistle, only pour a certain amount before’ reset’ and do other seemingly magic things.

@Chancerubbage @uliwitness

Other 'magic things' may include pots with 2 chambers, for different fluids from the same container.

Also known as the assassin's teapot!
🫖

Here's a short video explaining how they work:
https://youtu.be/kkrgUT70Mbo?si=jjX35UHltbdiKNZv

The Assassin's Teapot

YouTube
@srfirehorseart @uliwitness I was trying to remember the examples. Yes just placing a finger over a different air inlet.
@srfirehorseart @uliwitness
The ones that make bird warbling noises are pretty interesting.
@uliwitness @thegarbagebird @gedeonm The criteria of sharpness for knives is OK, I guess...

@rubinjoni @thegarbagebird @gedeonm Not really. There were those late night commercial presentations and their ridiculous “you can use our knife to cut a coke can”, which turned out to have completely different criteria than the usual problem of getting past the resistant skin of a tomato.

When did you last have to cut a coke can? See! 😂

@uliwitness @thegarbagebird @gedeonm Also shaving hairs and finely cutting loose paper... There's gimmick sharpness, and there's practical sharpness.
@rubinjoni @uliwitness @thegarbagebird @gedeonm I agree on the coke can (would not do that anyway, afterwards the knife is surely not sharp anymore). But, working as a chef, if the knife is not sharp enough to cut hair it is not sharp enough for perfect tomato slices. Preparing food with a not sharp enough knife is a nuisance instead of a you and the results are sub par. Of course it will taste fine but not only the look, also the texture of the finished product depends on even cuts.

@uliwitness @rubinjoni @gedeonm you've never had to take the widet out of a guinness tin? do you even recycle? one of those daytime-tv-between-the-soaps, late-night-between-the-life-insurance-commercials knifes will sort you right out!
eversharp! you know serration? what if they did more of it? you never have to sharpen it, because you can't sharpen it! if you see one of them shits on a knife-pervert channel, it will be because they have sanded down that brittle bullshit steel and made it ALMOST as sharp as a knife made of literal jelly crystals.

sometimes you get a free paring knife. it's equally useless because you aren't a presentation chef, you don't need a passion paring knife

@thegarbagebird @uliwitness @rubinjoni @gedeonm

That reminds me of a fictional scythe:

"Death's scythe is one of the two sharpest objects in existence. It is capable of slicing air, shadows and even time. Most importantly, it is designed to sever souls from their mortal shells. The blade is almost transparent, but glows blue thanks to the energy released by atoms splitting on its edge"

https://wiki.lspace.org/Death%27s_Scythe

Death's Scythe - Discworld & Terry Pratchett Wiki

@srfirehorseart @uliwitness @rubinjoni @gedeonm the fucken denoument of reaper man lives in my head forever. righteous, narratively satisfying anger is the sharpest blade
@srfirehorseart
I saw the first couple of words on your post and hoped it'd be a Death reference.
I want to fav this post over and over again for this.
Thank you 🖤

@pascoda

I'm happy to have shared a Discworld gem you love.
🖤

@rubinjoni @uliwitness @gedeonm NO! TOO COMMERCIAL! DO NOT QUANTIF~ i actually don't know where i am going with this. i am really tired and overwrought and as a result i am simply firing poorly-thought-out riffs into the federated timeline. i’m sorry, all. i’ll try to take it down a notch
@thegarbagebird @uliwitness @gedeonm Now try fountain pen review forums. A whole 'nother world.

@uliwitness @gedeonm

Refill of your demitasse sir?

Turk2white.htm

@uliwitness @gedeonm

I’m not certain how its volume compares to a shot of espresso.