Toot Calls 
Alice McFlurry 
Do you post funny things?
Do you have fewer than 100 followers?
If so, please comment with a link to something funny that you wrote on Mastodon that youβre proud of so we can all see!
o c t o g h o s t :firefish: 
o c t o g h o s t (@xy)
π Six mojitos are 74 dollars on the catamaran carrying you and your 'posse' from one beach to another - identical - beach. The night oracle plays Latino hard house as you lose your snorkeling mask in the infinity pool. Seafood is nature's greatest scam, mom claims on the phone π
Cats Who Draw 
@Alice Pretty proud of this one! https://mastodon.art/@catswhocode/110617676047077295
Cats Who Draw (@[email protected])
@[email protected] fellas, if your girl -is primarily composed of heavy infantry equipped with a shield, spatha or scramasax -includes the occasional francisca and pike -is formed in wedge formation, with a supporting heavy cavalry force equipped with lance and sword then she's not your girl, she's a visigoth
Grum999 
@Alice Ooh no, I never post funny things 
Ian Tindale@Alice fewer is more
Rob of San Francisco@Alice So hard to choose. So very hard.
SusanI love this post! Iβm stealing the idea!
BigthinkingcapThis is a wonderful idea @Alice
Thank you..I will definitely look forward to the replies.
Happy Thursday, lovely π«π¦πππ
Thank you..I will definitely look forward to the replies.
Happy Thursday, lovely π«π¦πππ
Joe Wynne π»πβ°οΈ@Alice
<<Danger - possible cult recruitment!>>
<<Danger - possible cult recruitment!>>
LAUREN
α΄ uΙα‘
AndrewAndrew (@[email protected])
I donβt wear jewellery. I squash insects and stick them on my face. They look beautiful and give the impression I can run very fast. #worldathletics #athletics #entymology #nature
Bored BabyBored Baby (@[email protected])
November Rain: "Everybody needs some time on their own" Kickass Slash solo "Sometimes I need some time on my own" Kickass Slash solo [He gets some time on his own] Sad Slash solo
Anti Satan@Alice I stopped being immature after Satan scared me, don't let yourself to be carried away by aliens.. https://bibly.com/@anti_satan/110983816036763376
Anti Satan (@[email protected])
Attached: 1 image alien times.. source: https://cdn.timefordisclosure.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/2-aliens-are-watching-us-768x432.jpg
kimbro
Ricki Yasha Tarr@Alice Great idea Alice!
Brian Wooley
Blank Frank@Alice More he he than ha ha but there it is. https://mstdn.social/@blankfrank/110944071284346794
Blank Frank (@[email protected])
BUS The other day on tv, a recent recruit to the world of being a bus driver was talking about how much she enjoyed her new work. The night shift in particular. But, she said, the only downside to working nights is that, after you are done with your shift and have brought the bus back to the depot, you get set to leave then realize you've missed the last bus home. #bus #busses #PublicTransport
PirateRo@Alice sadly, I am bereft of followers and humorless.
Lately, I think a gourd might change that, alas, they are oddly shaped and oddly flavored.
MikeZilla Minus One
gojira
gojira (@[email protected])
Attached: 1 image Phone notification (reminder to apply flea medication to cats): βTomorrow - Kittens Revolutionβ My Brain:
Urethramancerπ@Alice No, yes and I don't want to get in trouble.
Flaming Cheeto
Flaming Cheeto (@[email protected])
Attached: 1 image Doc: try to limit your sodium Local grocery store: we want him dead!
Ko Simon toku ingoa 
SimonCHulse (@[email protected])
I am very proud of my 21m old. She now calls SUVs βyucky truck.β
Tmyakal@Alice Not saying it's a great joke, but I made it myself:
https://bbq.snoot.com/@tmyakal/110791262842148734
https://bbq.snoot.com/@tmyakal/110791262842148734
Tmyakal (@[email protected])
Her: If you want me to put my mouth on it, you need to shave it first. Me, using a safety razor to peel a potato: Honey, please! You need to get help! This is some kind of eating disorder!
Shubham 
J.A. Pipes β
J.A. Pipes β (@[email protected])
Do we get to vote on which humans get sent? NASA is sending humans to an asteroid: SpaceX will get them there https://thehill.com/opinion/technology/4148972-nasa-is-sending-humans-to-an-asteroid-spacex-will-get-them-there/
Shubham :arch: (@[email protected])
@[email protected] That's fine but I don't know what micro blogging has to do with coffee
Daniel Gruno@Alice does the crowd have to laugh *with me*, or is it enough that they just lauhj *at me*? 'Cause i got plenty of that...
@Alice spelling on the other hand....
Phasorburn (chaos monkey, esq.)@Alice also, apple + after party came close to that gourd Ricki was talking about.
Not that there was an actual gourd, except in one or two frames, but hey! Gourds!
Chris Dudley@Alice I made this together with an AI here on mastodon. It is meant to be funny.
JohnW@Alice I'm more of a Steven Wright kind of guy, with a side of Robin Williams that's out of the spotlight.
Malc@Alice I do... twice? I'm gonna have to actually try here on Mastodon π
Stephen Mooney
Paul RosenPaul Rosen (@[email protected])
Considering how many spiders we eat every year when asleep, it seems only fair that they bite us once in a while.