Edited to update: BlackQueerLife instance now has a properly-set-up channel for receiving money contributions. If you wanted the Fediverse to be more welcoming to Black people, it's one practical way to help :-)
https://opencollective.com/blackqueerlife
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New instance for Black queer people:
"My intention for BlackQueerLife is that when Black queers are searching for a place in the fediverse to call home, we are accessible to them."
- @tillshadeisgone
Well, there isn't one ultimate definition for either of them! Both have been used in different ways over many years.
Some people like "queer" because it's an umbrella term covering any kind of deviation from sexual-orientation norms. Some people dislike it, usually because it's been thrown at them as a term of abuse.
Some people use gay to mean specifically same-sex or same-gender preference, as distinct from bi - but historically, gay has also been used as an umbrella term.
No, because there are queer people who only have same-sex attractions, and there are bi people who wouldn't call themselves queer :-)
Yes, bi would usually mean specifically that you're attracted to people of more than one gender (e.g. both men and women, or both women & nonbinary people), whereas some people who only have same-sex / same-gender attractions might still call themself queer. Also, queer often has a connotation that you know you've gone outside the norm and you're happy about that, whereas bi is a bit more like "a practical description".
But each can still mean different things to different people!
Haha, I like your metaphor :-)
It is kind of an endless-learning area though, so I sympathise! I've been out as bi for 20-odd years now and I'm still always reading and learning how people think about these things.
Also, just to add one more dimension to your summary there, "bi" can be a label we embrace and celebrate too :-)
So there isn't an easy answer about the words! & maybe the most helpful answer is to understand that different people might have different ways of using them, & different reasons for preferring them. If you keep that in mind, you probably won't go far wrong :-)
@unchartedworlds @gocu54 A sweetie of mine likes to quote that
"Labels make useful servants but terrible masters."
Amazing Faerin
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