Brianna WuJul 3, 2023
Women of Mastodon! How do you deal with men talking over you in a professional setting?
Show threadBrianna WuJul 3, 2023

2/ None of my go-tos are great. Interjecting, “can I please finish,” is the best I have. Raising your voice and repeating until they stop is aggressive and bitchy.

Letting them say whatever, totally ignoring, and starting over from the beginning also works but is super bitchy.

Show threadMatt WilcoxJul 3, 2023
@briannawu As a bloke I’m aware I’m not who you’re asking. I would just like to say however that those are not something I’d consider bitchy. If the muppet can’t shut their mouth and be polite, that’s a them problem and they can learn to back off because they can’t behave like that. Disallow that behaviour by making it impossible. Don’t stop talking. You have the ground.
Show threadBrianna WuJul 3, 2023
@mattwilcox I wish we lived in a world where you didn’t lose status for doing that.
Show threadMatt WilcoxJul 3, 2023
@briannawu I wish there was anything to be done that doesn’t amount to “wait for the archaic attitudes to die out because they’re seen as unacceptable”. Sadly, I doubt there’s much you can do from your side of this shit show other than get other men on board. Which suuuucks.
Show threadRufus J. CooterJul 3, 2023

@mattwilcox @briannawu FWIW, as a fellow bloke, here's a bit of 'allyship' that I practice that many seem to find helpful:

When I'm in the room for a man pulling that BS (especially if it's "my" meeting), after 15-20 seconds, I'll cut the dude off w/ an explanation that they're off-topic, the ideas that they're proposing aren't feasible or change the scope of work (or all 3); then, I stop myself short, w/ a big "Oh, terribly sorry, Brianna, we interrupted you! You were saying?"

Show threadBrianna WuJul 3, 2023
@RufusJCooter @mattwilcox THANK YOU. This is appreciated more than you know.
Show threadRufus J. CooterJul 3, 2023

@briannawu @mattwilcox (I've been thanked more than once, so I have some inkling, but honestly, if it's just you, me, and the rest of the Fediverse, this seems like the bare minimum?)

(Side benefit: it seems like I'm the only one in my peer cohort of middle managers who can wrap up a 1-hour meeting, in, y'know, 1-hour. Probably just a coincidence...)

Show threadMartha Howell
@RufusJCooter @briannawu @mattwilcox
It's the way it should be, but it's diamond rare in real life. Thanks for your support and your example.
Jul 4, 2023 at 1:42amWeb