"Be kind" is not a complete thought. Be kind to who? And don't say "Be kind to everyone!š¤" Because it's not possible to be kind to everyone.
Mr. Rogers is often held up as the example of someone that was kind to everyone. But even he roasted racists! He was unsympathetic to bigots who wanted to hold on to America's tradition of segregation. Something, something, paradox of tolerance.
"Be kind" is often the coward's way out of speaking up for those that need defending.
@mekkaokereke When heās sharing his towel to teach kids pool segregation is racist bullshit š
You are right, he would not be kind to racists!
The "paradox of tolerance" vanishes with the realization that it is not a moral principle but a pragmatic social contract.
@dashdsrdash @mekkaokereke This is something I've struggled with a bit.
I totally agree that 'be kind to everyone' shouldn't stop of from defending the opressed, because at that point it becomes cowardice as you say and is an immoral act.
However I see a lot of behavior that isn't defending the opressed but instead de-humanizes the person we see as the agressor.
I think what I'm saying here is that this problem wants to be fixed with a verbal scalpel, not a mighty swing of a giant hammer.
Yeah, to me that's the difference between "nice" and "kind". Nice people can enable fascists, kind people don't.
@pearlbear @brandonscript @mekkaokereke
The etymology of āniceā is illuminating:
late 13c., "foolish, ignorant, frivolous, senseless," from Old French nice (12c.) "careless, clumsy; weak; poor, needy; simple, stupid, silly, foolish," from Latin nescius "ignorant, unaware," literally "not-knowing," from ne- "not" (from PIE root *ne- "not") + stem of scire "to know" (see science).
Next thing you'll tell me is that "civil" was an adjective applied to social inferiors.
@pearlbear @brandonscript @mekkaokereke
Many years ago I saw the play "Into the Woods." One of the most stunning, condemning lyrics was:
"You're nice. You're not good, you're not bad, you're just nice."
Hit like a brick to the gut, because that's exactly it.
@pearlbear @brandonscript @mekkaokereke
Pleasant is overrated. Resist.
@mekkaokereke Someone pointed out once that that scene is significant to Christians in particular, because it directly references washing someone else's feet, implicitly putting them in a servant position, as Jesus did in the Biblical story.
So of course, someone being like Jesus towards black people made a bunch of Christians SUPER mad.
@rbos @mekkaokereke Iām not religious myself, but I grew up around religion.
To me thereās always been a distinction between Christians and āChristiansā, in particular in America it would seem.
You donāt get to just slap the label onto yourself if youāre not going to participate in the culture that label actually signifies.
Not being jealous of each other, not killing each other, being kind to each other, those are all base tenants of the religion.
At the checkout line at the grocery store my 4yo once asked me, "Do you know that person, is he your friend?" "No", I said.
Kid then asked, why are you being nice to him? (Teenager, working, helping me)
I just said that I will always start off that way unless I have a really good reason not to.
Edit to also say that the 4yo used to call it "Mr. Rogershood" which is definitely a place I would live!
@mekkaokereke
Contrary to bigotry, metta calls us to have an active, benevolent interest in others. It calls us to protect the victims of bigotry and to show the bigot their error. It does not require us to put up with their shit.
;-)
In this latest kerfuffle over the Billionaire Tin Can Death, I've noticed who tends to cape for Kindness and I've found, once again, that *certain* folks (AHEM) think manners are an appropriate substitute (or maybe proxy is the better word) for having a strong political ethos.
@Are0h @mekkaokereke
There are some excellent posts about this on Tik Tok and the demographic of the Cape for Kindness Brigade is, well, you know. š¤
And it just makes me think that, damn, some folks *again* need to really really think about what it means to have a good politics and whether they have one--and what's the grounding for it.
Cuz the My Little Pony version of the Sermon on the Mount ain't gonna get us to liberation.
Pshhhh.
@Are0h
Right?
No class consciousness or worker solidarity.
No economic justice lens.
Certainly no lens through which to break down white supremacy or patriarchy.
Just...'Being mean isn't a good look.'
I can't.
Moral clarity implies calling people out who actively clash with your values. We must not be paralyzed by āthe paradox of tolerance.ā
"The Paradox of Tolerance disappears if you look at tolerance, not as a moral standard, but as a social contract.
If someone does not abide by the terms of the contract, then they are not covered by it."
See thread about the Paradox of Tolerance: https://newsie.social/@ZhiZhu/109667628453454747
Attached: 1 image The philosopher Karl Popper published what came to be known as the Paradox of Tolerance in his book "The Open Society and Its Enemies" in 1945. It dealt with the question of how a society that promotes tolerance is to deal with those who are intolerant. #Paradox #philosophy
@ZhiZhu @mekkaokereke
I like this because it fits how you make safe spaces for charged conversations. The group makes a shared covenant of what is acceptable. Once the covenant is made, not abiding by it excludes you from the group.
@nnethercote @ZhiZhu @mekkaokereke look into the impossibility proofs in fair machine learning. There's no paradox but the proof is correct and people don't like what it says.
Fairness (defined reasonably) is mathematically impossible.
It's just a fact and we need to start dealing with the consequences not pretending it isn't true.
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