There isn't a "crisis in masculinity."
There are just guys who can't cope with there being any standards or expectations for their behavior at all after being told they could literally do whatever they wanted and treat people like property.
There's a reason every proposed "solution" is misogynist as hell and involves forcing women into a social position where their lives, bodies, and livelihoods are entirely controlled by men.
Because these men are pigs and want to live life on easy mode.
@gwynnion
I first read this as “true men”, and I think in my misread, you've coined a perfect term. :-)
“True Men” (as in those who don’t need to diminish others to prove some kind of dominance bullshit) are also victims of toxic masculinity. And yes, it's largely up to them (us) to solve the problem.
@dariusdunlap "true men" or "real men" or whatever other way to set up a classification is...still toxic masculinity.
Trying to rebrand "real men" as a good thing is just another way to make certain people feel good and ignore continuing problems.
It's perfectly fine to label actions as good or bad without attaching them to a definition of masculinity.
@gwynnion
@gwynnion Thank you for writing this.
Without diminishing how much worse the patriarchy is for women (and children and LGBT+ people) I wish more men realized that this is a very bad deal for us too.
Not because it is a necessary motivation (it really shouldn't be!) but because it is, IMHO, an important piece of the puzzle to understanding how oppression requires to divide people.
No one is free until everyone is free.
@gwynnion If you described what you mean by 'toxic masculinity' (I am pretty sure that's not a concept that has a neat universally accepted definition) and how average Joe might be perpetuating it that might have been constructive.
But here you suggest that people identifying or perceived as male are somehow responsible for whatever other people identifying or perceived as such do. That's plain old prejudice and collective guilt. That always plays into the hands of fascists in the end.
I guess it's not surprising that all the solutions being proposed *where the problem is framed in a weird misogynist way* are misogynist.
Like, the solutions I can think of being proposed to toxic masculinity all revolve around men becoming less toxic - taking consent seriously, going to therapy, parents making sure their boys don't get the "boys will be boys" treatment. But folks I follow are probably not using the phrase "crisis in masculinity".
@gwynnion "Crisis in masculinity" sounds like a phrase with cultural baggage attached to it beyond the literal meaning of the words, and I'm not aware of that baggage.
If you asked me to guess at its meaning without hints I might guess things like, men being more violent, impulsive, homophobic and generally fragile in their identity, prone to addictions and other unhealthy coping mechanisms, having unprocessed trauma, etc.
An arguably real "crisis in masculinity".
@gwynnion ... But if that was what the folks using it meant they'd probably choose a slightly different phrasing than "crisis in masculinity".
So it has to mean the opposite, right? The culture wars "crisis in masculinity" is that the actual long-running crisis in masculinity is showing signs of improving and the men in wrap around shades yelling at their phones in the cabs of their pickup trucks don't want it to?
@gwynnion I'd like to add that there's a "crisis of male dominance" and it's being misnamed.
Advancements in gender equality will also advance this so-called crisis, and misogynists will call it "crisis of masculinity" as a framing device.
To plant the idea that masculinity is when we dominate, or that some worthy institution is being torn down, as opposed to the disgusting institution that it is.
@gwynnion Your post is genuinely interesting.
Men are, as you say, victims of toxic masculinity. But they're also victims - as women are - to generalisations.
"One man/woman treated me badly ergo all men/women will treat me badly".
I was really pleased when I saw you'd typed "these" men not "all" men. 👍🏻
However, I still feel myself correctly heaped together with these reprobates.
This is defintely a problem all men have to fix together.
Fix the attitude, fix the problem
@gwynnion i still feel there is a crisis, because what it meant to be "a man" was based on oppression. Questioning foundations leads to a crisis.
Also, we are mostly pointing out what manhood should NOT be about, leading to a void and identity crisis to rediscover what it SHOULD be about.
So yes, There are the men in "crisis" who are doubling down on old toxic traits as a reaction. But there are the men in "crisis" genuinely trying to rediscover their identity and become better.
@gwynnion the real ‘crisis in masculinity’ is that masculinity can no longer be based on a culture of domination and violent status games, and some deeply indoctrinated men simply cannot conceive of an alternative to that outdated paradigm in which they were raised.
The clinging to existing power structures takes the form of a crisis for those who are resisting change.
For those of us already in the process of letting go, it’s not perceived as a crisis but rather a time of profound healing.
Nowhere Girl
DanaBlankenhorn
Darius
creek
TransitBiker
Francesco Orsenigo (he/him)
hramrach
timberwraith
ghost of a ghost
dragonfrog
Woodswalked
Arthur Detoo
Earthling
Nasos Alaiskas 
fabiosantoscode
Man Blues
Mike Knell
Sérgio Isidoro
Jim
Erlend Sogge Heggen
PointlessSpike
SgtMoredread🇨🇦