Imani Gandy is Senior Editor of Law & Policy for Rewire News Group

"The Satanic Temple is not going to save you."

=NO, NOT THAT SORT OF SATANIC CHURCH=

By now, most people have heard *something* about "The Satanic Temple," and many believe they have a good idea about what it is already.

These people are wrong.

So, before getting into what #TST *is*, let's establish what it is *not*

The Temple and its members do not worship or believe in a literal, supernatural devil.

Likewise, TST members do not conduct animal sacrifices, ritualistically abuse children, etc.

#TheSatanicTemple is not the same thing the "#ChurchOfSatan," another atheistic organization founded by Howard "#AntonLaVey" Levey in San Francisco in 1966.

TST's foundational text is not #TheSatanicBible, which LaVey published in 1969.

The Satanic Temple is not a leftist or even progressive organization.

The Temple does not have a history of legal victories taking advantage of "religious freedom loopholes".

The Satanic Temple is not a federally recognized religion; however, one of its half-dozen corporations did get IRS approval as a tax-exempt church.

https://queersatanic.com/what-the-hell-is-the-satanic-temple-ep-5-the-satanic-temple-inc/

=WHAT THE HELL IS "THE SATANIC TEMPLE"?=

So, if that's what The Satanic Temple is *not*, well, what is TST really?

As of 2022, TST is a collection of at least six corporations, four for-profit and two non-profit, with only one of those being a tax-exempt church.

The Temple and its two owners, #CevinSoling and #DougMisicko, describe that church in contradictory ways depending on the venue and most expedient excuse at that moment.

But in March 2012 when the web domains TheSatanicTemple .com and .org, were registered, TST was just a twinkle in the eye of Cevin "#MalcolmJarry" Soling as he imagined a prank documentary about "the nicest Satanic Cult in the world".

Along with friend and collaborator David "Nicholas Crowe" Guinan, Soling used his own company Spectacle Films, Inc. to begin producing this "nice Satanists" movie with the first stunt a public prayer event in Tallahassee, Fla., in January 2013.

Soling had brought his friend Doug Misicko (a.k.a. "#DougMesner"), a self-identified Satanist, in on the project to be an expert and add verisimilitude.

Originally intended to be a role shared by Guinan, Soling, and Misicko, it was Misicko who would eventually step into the "#LucienGreaves" role full time after the first actor—and stunt— flopped.

Through 2013, #TheSatanicTemple muddled through a number of different stunts and contrary postures from "Adopt-a-Highway" to Misicko "teabagging" the grave of the Westboro Baptist Church leader Fred Phelps' mother, which got coverage from Vice, HuffPo, and others as a "#PinkMass"

Finally, at the end of the year, Guinan, Misicko, and Soling landed on the stunt that would bring them to lasting national prominence: the promise that they would install their own Baphomet statue opposite a public monument to the 10 Commandments in Oklahoma.

Tens of thousands of dollars in donations followed; the fact that TST never actually sued anyone and the ACLU won the case without any help from the Temple mattered not at all.

The Satanic Temple also made sure that this specific statue design was officially TST's intellectual property and a registered trademark they could sue over.

The Satanic Temple made sure their statue got them into lots of headlines and proceeded to fundraise off of the idea they could counter Christian monuments with the threat of their own statue arriving to guarantee religious plurality was preserved; more money poured in.

In reality, as the prank doc drifted into a project with no end date, #DavidGuinan eventually left it.

Cevin Soling and Doug Misicko embarked together on creating first a for-profit corporation (United Federation of Churches, LLC d/b/a The Satanic Temple) then a 501c3 nonprofit (Reason Alliance Ltd.).

Soling would then create another for-profit he solely owned (64 Bridge LLC d/b/a "Salem Art Gallery") to house the statue and charge $8-$12 tickets to come take pictures with it.

You see them on social media all the time, and that's why.

In November 2020, as part of the official depositions for a lawsuit against the city of Belle Plaine, Minn., TST revealed that these ticket sales had since July 2017 brought in at least $182,000.

And that came *after* Misicko got caught lying about an invoice that revealed just how much fundraiser money Misicko had paid himself for the Belle Plaine stunt.

https://queersatanic.com/this-invoice-reveals-the-inner-workings-of-the-satanic-temples-finances/

In short, The Satanic Temple is:

• ineffective at fulfilling its promises
• opaque in its finances
• structured to be internally authoritarian with
unaccountable leaders;
• its two owners have troubling interests that show up in TST's work repeatedly

But when it comes to The Satanic Temple, there’s always more and it’s always worse
https://queersatanic.com/when-it-comes-to-the-satanic-temple-theres-always-more-and-its-always-worse/

=THE SATANIC TEMPLE HAS REPEATEDLY FAILED ITS PROMISES=

The Temple's theory of change, as co-owner Cevin Soling defined it in 2012, is that TST can successfully invoke the religious liberty protections the letter of the law describes.

This is in order to—by some force of magic unspecified—bind the powerful to the promises they have no incentive or obligation to fulfill.

Indeed, to date, the Temple has lost all of its abortion-related challenges.

This includes state and federal cases, and it includes TST's other owner Doug Misicko belittling their first client, "Mary Doe" while their two cases involving her failed.

One of these cases was lost because TST didn't bother to file it till after Mary Doe had already had her abortion, which meant she had no legal standing to make her claim at all.

This is typical.

Although they also lose if it ever gets to the merits, The Satanic Temple's lawyers miss deadlines, make basic errors in their citations, and they stubbornly repeat already rejected arguments then brag about behaving as onerous as possible as litigants.

The Satanic Temple rarely fights the battles it claims to, but when it does, it does so badly and loses.

https://queersatanic.com/the-satanic-temple-is-very-bad-at-court-cases/

=THE SATANIC TEMPLE HAS OPAQUE FINANCES=

Yes, The Satanic Temple *is* a prank-documentary film project originally intended for Spectacle Films, Inc., but it's *also* a limited liability corporation called "United Federation of Churches, LLC d/b/a 'The Satanic Temple' " that sells merchandise for profit — which includes T-shirts but also its membership cards, currently $35.

*And* #TheSatanicTemple is a nonprofit called "Reason Alliance. Ltd.", also owned by Misicko and Soling but sometimes listing itself as "Reason Alliance / TST" and sending nonprofit donations back to their for-profit UFC LLC—or paying Misicko for ostensible but unspecified work.

Then, TST is *also* a tax-exempt church registered as "The Satanic Temple", then as "The Satanic Temple, Inc.", which discloses no finances publicly but collects hundreds of thousands in donations.

All of the decisions and all of the revenue for these corporations—and more!—are controlled by just two men.

https://queersatanic.com/today-is-a-good-day-for-the-satanic-temple-to-release-its-finances/5/