AutisticTeacherGriffDec 27, 2022

So a question for my #autistic pals here:

I have... multiple advanced degrees, in a discipline that's supposed to make people make sense to me. I know, intellectually, all the "stuff" that people "should" do in social interaction. I could write books on it. But I cannot - CANNOT - do it in real time. I always lag behind anywhere from 3 seconds to 3 years.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who has this problem, where head-knowledge won't translate into real-time action.

#ActuallyAutistic

Show threadCavitationDec 28, 2022
@TeacherGriff
Yes, I think that is common. As another autistic high-achiever, my theory is that with #austistic people, their language skills are poor in the non-language area, but often fine in the language area. Animals communicate with each other, but only humans do so using spoken and especially written language. But the major part of social interaction is non-verbal - such as body posture, intonation, facial expression, emotion etc, which autistic people are poor(er) at.
So autistic people manage best in purely written language situations, okay at purely spoken, and poorly when actually having to directly interact with other people.
Autistic people can improve these outcomes, by playing to their strengths and minimising their weaknesses - and the technology around today helps with this - using emails instead of phone call, using phone calls instead of face-to-face, and using formal social settings in place of free-form settings, for instance.
Show threadAutisticTeacherGriffDec 28, 2022

@cavitation

Oh, I know all that stuff. But I can't *do* that stuff, and no amount of trying to "improve" my ability to do nonverbal nonsense has ever worked, and sometimes people get mad when I suggest the workarounds instead of face-to-face interaction. I can't win. :/

Show threadCavitation
@TeacherGriff
Do you explain you have Asperger's?
Increasingly, I do. And because there is so much general knowledge in the population about this (every second tv show has an #autistic character for instance), this often helps a lot.
I know other people are reluctant to tell others they are autistic, which puzzles me. It's often assumed by other people (or they just label you as "odd"). Autistic people often think they are passing as typical people, but with our crap nonverbal skills, we usually aren't.
After all, blind or deaf people explain or indicate their disabilities, when it's useful to do so. We should too.
Dec 29, 2022 at 7:20pmWeb
Show threadAutisticTeacherGriffDec 29, 2022

@cavitation

Oh, I do tell people I'm autistic (not Aspergers - that word is associated with N*zis, and I avoid it).

But I think this is really more about my own frustration that I keep lagging behind. I dislike how it makes me feel when I'm always the last one to get the point.