The ultimate superpower is being able to eat an entire pizza by yourself, but the kryptonite is having to buy pants with an elastic waistband afterwards 🍕😂

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Life is a pizza, even when it's bad, it's still pretty saucy 🍕

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I'm reading a book on anti-gravity, it's impossible to put down ⚖️

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The pursuit of fitness is a never-ending cycle of buying expensive gym memberships and using them to hang your clothes 🏋️‍♀️💸

🍆🍑 Series - My Stepmother Is Such a Slut - Episode 8 - Italian
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Why did the coffee file a police report? Because it got mugged! ☕👮

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