Swansea mum shares empty nest grief as survey finds most parents track children after leaving for university

Parents across the UK are bracing for what researchers call a “not so empty nest,” as new figures show the majority believe their children will return home after graduating. The Empty Nest Survey 2025, commissioned by Unite Students, found that 85% of parents expect their children to “boomerang” back — a trend driven by economic pressures and a tougher graduate jobs market.

Swansea parent describes loss and pride

Angharad, a mum of two from Swansea, recently dropped her daughter off at UWE Bristol. She said the experience left her with mixed emotions.

“I didn’t want to leave her in this strange place, living with strangers in an unfamiliar city. I cried a little on the way home,” she said. “When I went into her empty bedroom I felt a sense of loss, like something was missing. But I also feel a real sense of pride in how she has managed the changes and challenges.”

Angharad said her daughter had already overcome hurdles in her first week, including navigating bus strikes in Bristol.

At a glance: Empty Nest Survey 2025

85%
of parents expect children to return home after university

83%
reported extreme grief after drop‑off

67%
use tracking apps to monitor their child’s location

25%
said they feel “a part of them is missing”

36%
said they’d be excited to reconnect if their child returned

Tracking apps divide parents

The survey also revealed how digital tools are reshaping parenting. Two‑thirds (67%) of parents admitted to using tracking apps to monitor their children’s location once they leave for university.

Angharad is cautious about the trend:

“Personally I feel it’s an invasion of their privacy, and could result in more worry and become a bit obsessive. Keep in regular contact with your child but give them the space they need.”

By contrast, Steven, a dad of two from Michaelston‑y‑Fedw, said his family uses Life360 to track each other:

“It means we know she’s home after a night out and is safe. She’s fine with it, she’s not bothered.”

Fathers report stronger grief

The survey found that 83% of parents reported extreme grief after drop‑off, with fathers (85%) more likely than mothers (79%) to feel the loss. A quarter said they felt “a part of them was missing,” while 14% admitted to crying uncontrollably.

Steven said the change had left a “big hole” in his family’s life:

“I’ll miss the phone calls at 3am to go and pick her and her friends up from the middle of Cardiff. I will also miss the house being full of her and her friends. I am excited for her, but sad for my wife and I.”

Experts urge balance

Dr Dominique Thompson, a GP and young people’s mental health expert, said parents need to “wean themselves off” tracking apps and allow young adults to grow.

“We need to be comfortable with not knowing where our adult children are at all times… that is part of growing up and making one’s own life choices.”

Top 10 tips: coming to terms with an empty nest

Find a new purpose
Having a new reason to get up every day is vital for wellbeing and provides structure and meaning. Help a neighbour, or even get a pet or plant to nurture.

Establish new routines
Loss of daily structure can throw you off. Create routines that make you feel good, such as a peaceful morning coffee or an evening walk.

Address sensory loss
You may miss their voice, smell, or movement around the home. Photos or familiar scents can help — wean yourself off gradually.

Address other issues
Avoid life‑changing decisions in the throes of sadness. Talk to people you trust, take time to ponder, and decide when you’re ready.

Give it time
If the loss feels like bereavement, remember adjustment takes time. Recovery happens in small steps, and support may be needed.

Focus on you
Use the time to address health, fitness, hobbies, or learning something new.

Avoid loneliness
Plan to spend time with family, friends or a partner. Make sure you see or speak to someone every day if you need company.

Stay in touch
Agree how often you’ll speak to your child and plan visits. For in‑between, set up a WhatsApp group for pictures and banter.

Don’t make them feel guilty
Let them know they’re missed with humour, not guilt. A tidy room photo works better than a crying emoji.

Ask for help
If you’re still struggling after 4–6 weeks, talk to your support network or GP. You’re not alone — help is out there.

Source: Unite Students

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