Giver” Era is Officially on Hiatus

Hey everyone, Tina here. Pull up a chair, grab a snack (because I certainly don’t have one to share right now), and let’s have a little heart-to-heart about the state of my “customer service” department.

You know that friend? The one who is always the “fixer”? The one people call when they need a jumpstart at 2 AM, a $20 loan until Friday, or a shoulder to cry on because they ignored your advice and went back to their toxic ex for the fourteenth time?

Yeah. For a long time, I was that girl. I prided myself on being the reliable one. I had the “I got you” energy on lock. But lately, I’ve realized that my “I got you” tank is running on fumes, and the fumes are actually just me hyperventilating into a paper bag.

Reaching the Limit: Entering the “Don’t Ask Me For Nothin'” Season

The other day, someone reached out asking for a “huge favor.” My eye started twitching before I even finished reading the text. It wasn’t even a hard favor, but my brain immediately went into lockdown mode. It was in that moment I realized I’ve reached my limit. I have officially entered my “Don’t Ask Me For Nothin’” era.

I saw this quote today that basically summed up my entire soul in one sentence:

“If u need anything, I mean anything, don’t hesitate to ask another mf cause ion got it.”

Read that again. Let it marinate. It is poetic. It is honest. It is my new voicemail greeting.

The Reality of Setting Boundaries

I know it sounds a little harsh, but hear me out. Setting boundaries is usually described as this elegant, peaceful process where you sit in a lotus position and say, “I am protecting my peace.”

In reality? Setting boundaries feels more like closing the shutters, locking the door, and pretending you aren’t home when you see the “Can I ask you a question?” bubble popping up on your phone.

What “Ion Got It” Really Means

“Ion got it” isn’t just about money—though, let’s be real, inflation is out here acting like a supervillain—it’s about everything:

1. Emotional Labor

I am currently at capacity. My empathy meter is at 1%. If you tell me your problems right now, I might just respond with “dang, that’s crazy” for three hours straight because I simply do not have the bandwidth to process your drama.

2. Time

If you ask me to help you move, just know I have a mysterious back injury that only flares up when I see a cardboard box.

3. Energy

I used to be the person who would stay up late helping people figure out their lives. Now? If it’s past 9 PM, my brain has already clocked out, filed its taxes, and gone to sleep.

Overcoming the Guilt of Being “Polite”

I think a lot of us feel this way, but we’re too “polite” to say it. We keep saying “yes” until we’re bitter, tired, and looking at our friends like they’re chores.

So, I’m giving you permission to join me in this season of unavailability. It’s okay to tell people that the shop is closed for inventory. It’s okay to admit that you are currently the “mf” who needs help, rather than the one giving it.

A Quick Guide for Those Asking for Favors

So, if you’re reading this and you were about to text me to ask if I can “just quickly” do something… please refer back to the quote above.

• Do I love you? Yes.
• Am I rooting for you? Always.
• Do I have the mental, physical, or financial resources to solve your current crisis? Refer to the previous answer.

Refilling the Cup

I’m taking some time to refill my own cup. And honestly? My cup is currently a thimble. It’s going to take a while. Until then, there are approximately 8 billion other people on this planet—surely one of them has what you’re looking for!

Stay hydrated, stay blessed, and most importantly, stay away from my inbox with “favors” for at least three to five business months.

#emotionalBurnout #FriendshipBoundaries #HealthyRelationships #MentalHealthAwareness #personalGrowth #protectingYourPeace #SayingNo #SelfCareTips #settingBoundaries #storiesFromTina #TheFixerMentality