Mastodawn

DoomsdaysCW Mar 22, 2025

@CheapPontoon
Two Boats and Helicopter Story (Parable of the Drowning Man)

By Jared Dees

A storm descends on a small town, and the downpour soon turns into a flood. As the waters rise, the local preacher kneels in prayer on the church porch, surrounded by water. By and by, one of the townsfolk comes up the street in a canoe.

“Better get in, Preacher. The waters are rising fast.”

“No,” says the preacher. “I have faith in the Lord. He will save me.”

Still the waters rise. Now the preacher is up on the balcony, wringing his hands in supplication, when another guy zips up in a motorboat.

“Come on, Preacher. We need to get you out of here. The levee’s gonna break any minute.”

Once again, the preacher is unmoved. “I shall remain. The Lord will see me through.”

After a while the levee breaks, and the flood rushes over the church until only the steeple remains above water. The preacher is up there, clinging to the cross, when a helicopter descends out of the clouds, and a state trooper calls down to him through a megaphone.

“Grab the ladder, Preacher. This is your last chance.”

Once again, the preacher insists the Lord will deliver him.

And, predictably, he drowns.

A pious man, the preacher goes to heaven. After a while he gets an interview with God, and he asks the Almighty, “Lord, I had unwavering faith in you. Why didn’t you deliver me from that flood?”

God shakes his head. “What did you want from me? I sent you two boats and a helicopter.”

https://jareddees.com/twoboats-helicopter-story/
#FEMA #ChristianRight #NoCommonSense

Two Boats and Helicopter Story (Parable of the Drowning Man) | Jared Dees

The man asked, "Why didn't you deliver me from that flood?" God shakes his head. "What did you want from me? I sent you two boats and a helicopter."

Jared Dees

Héctor The One And Only Jul 5, 2024

I read an article on a news site yesterday that a pansexual male porn star who does movies with men, women, and anything in between was convicted for his actions during the January 6th insurrection.

So, dude, let me get this straight, you are not straight, fuck men, women, drag queens, trans-men, trans-women, twinks, fatties, hunks, sluts, virgins, and anything that will fit your penis, but you want the Republicans to assume power?

Clearly you are not a very smart man, because if you had any critical thinking capabilities at all, you would not want the very people who want to do away with you and all of your fuckbuddies but also want to do away with porn, which is the source of your income and your notoriety.

Those people you went there to put in power will probably want to put you in a concentration camp. Good luck in prison. Luckily you're already adept at taking it up the ass, so you will be popular.

#NoCommonSense

GG Mar 24, 2024

"If Pierre #Poilievre loses the next election, it will be because of moments like this.

Outside Brian Mulroney’s funeral, Pierre can’t put politics aside and speak to the man’s legacy and family without trying to score political points against his own opponents."

#NotAStatesman #NoCommonSense #cdnpoli #montreal @andrewtumilty

NeeNee Aug 19, 2023

I am over today at 8 AM.
#idiots #nocommonsense #listen #itsnotallaboutyou

Victoria Stuart 🇨🇦 🏳️‍⚧️Aug 10, 2023

Supreme Court of Canada refuses to hear appeal from B.C. churches opposed to COVID-19 ruling 😷
https://bc.ctvnews.ca/supreme-court-of-canada-refuses-to-hear-appeal-from-b-c-churches-opposed-to-covid-19-ruling-1.6513874

* 3 B.C. churches argued their constitutional rights violated when provincial restrictions banned indoor religious services at height of the COVID-19 pandemic 🤨
* Riverside Calvary Chapel (Langley)
* Immanuel Covenant Reformed Church (Abbotsford)
* Free Reformed Church (Chilliwack)

#COVID19 #antilockdown #ChristianRight #Canada #BritishColumbia #PublicHealth #NoCommonSense

Supreme Court of Canada refuses to hear appeal from B.C. churches opposed to COVID-19 ruling

The Supreme Court of Canada has refused to hear an appeal from three British Columbia churches that argued their constitutional rights were violated when provincial restrictions banned indoor religious services at the height of the COVID-19 pandemic.

British Columbia