When men get it through their heads that they shouldn't put their penises in random holes in the woods, we can finally stop running these PSAs telling men to stop putting their penises in random holes in the woods, but as long as all men (#YesAllMen) keep putting their penises in random holes in the woods, we're going to have to keep telling men to stop putting their penises in random holes in the woods.
So, men...
STOP PUTTING YOUR PENISES IN RANDOM HOLES IN THE WOODS. IT'S NOT SAFE.
Imagine having one of those classic #HoleInTheWoods situations (everyone knows about those) and having to buy back your #penis on the #BlackMarket...
It happens all the time. 
Imagine...
You are wandering in the woods, and you see an inviting looking hole in a tree or the ground or something, so you decide to stick your penis in...
STOP!
You don't know what's in that hole. You may stick your penis in thinking it's a good idea, but before you know it, *Snap!*, your penis is gone!
IT COULD HAPPEN TO YOU!
Do the right thing. Do the bright thing.
THINK before you put your penis in unfamiliar holes.
JUST SAY NO.
Nuki Raccoon: Fedi's Favorite Furry F***poster