#GoodnightPoem

We all view the world lonely
Sometimes we view the world gratefully
Through someone's eyes
Is growing up really just viewing
Through your own eyes
Dissapointing everyone you meet
From your eyes
To cry tears not shared
To view the world no longer with wonder
To realize how much the 14 year old you
Would've hated who you became
Another dissapointment
I'll keep trying to forget
What I used to dream
How the world looked from hopeful eyes

#GoodnightPoem

Do you ever think about the butterfly effect?
How just one small thing
One second
Can make a new world
Do you think about how if everything had gone to plan
I never would've talked to you
We wouldn't be here together
Under the stars
I would never see the fireworks I do
When I look at you
I think about this often
Because if everything had gone to plan
As I had so desperately hoped
I would be missing you so much
And I wouldn't even know

#GoodnightPoem

"I don't think I'll forget you..."
I'll remember you when I'm crying
My tears splashing
Like raindrops
Echoing our rainy walks
With you the stars stood still
I'll never see them the same way
I'll remember how your smile
As clique as it sounds
Brightened my day
How I'd be sad not to see you
For even just a couple hours
I'll remember your words
Dreaming about who you are
I'll always forget you never felt the same
"... Because not to brag but I'm really good at remembering names!"

An early #GoodnightPoem

We wished for it all
We saw the world for the worst
Yet somehow still full of wonder
We cried coming home
Ending the warm summer nights
If I knew it was a dream
I would have smiled more
Cried more
Tears of joy, this time
I've never felt so excited
to feel so anxious
I feel I lost what mattered
To me, I lost what I didn't see
and right now
I'm in the same dream
Wondering why can't I smile
Knowing I will look back with regret
For now I'm in the dream
and will I ever dream again

#GoodnightPoem

To plant a tree is a simple act
May you both prosper
You plant a sapling in my mind
of what could be
and after all I dream of
I wake up wondering
Only if it was real

#GoodnightPoem

And I try to say these thousand words
Through the longing look in my eyes
Words meant maybe not for you
But for who I hope you are
And I wonder why
Can't I be happy with who I am
And not who I wish I was
Something I irrationally imagine
you don't have to think
about yourself

Tired.

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Z

#GoodnightPoem

#GoodnightPoem

So free when I run
Trapped in the body that's always been
No ones seems to matter
The no one for me I fear will always be so
A beautiful world around me
I wake up with dread for the world I have to see
Life is a wonder
I await the eternal silence I can't comprehend, what faces us all
Fear, I hope every day to escape
The happiness that all looks so out reach
The beauty I still can't see, invisible to me
I fear, forever
I fear eternity
So I run

#GoodnightPoem

My splotchy nail polish
An accidental act of defiance
Careless paint streaks
Somehow bring joy
My nails, whiter than usual
Rebel against conformance
To me, they are just nails
Colors on my hands
Making me smile
The stains on my skin
Left behind from the hasty application
Accidents that remind me
Of the rooms painted late at night
With my grandma
The wet paint flooding my senses
Listening to her past rebellions
Unimaginable to me as defiance
wearing pants to school,
finding her people who did not belong,
living without a care
living to find joy
These accidental rebellions
That we use to create our own joy
I was hesitant even to put white on my nails
Because from a young age I've been taught
To live an interesting life
And because "white is a boring color"
Nothing has to be boring however,
If you find ways to create your own joy