Ann Arbor Pitchbot

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Grumpy townie since 1983. Sometimes parody is indistinguishable from reality. DM your pitches. they/them
Traffic violence is among the best tools from the point of view of fighting gentrification. Dieting our roads to make them safe would be almost as bad as new market-rate housing, because it would attract new settler-colonialists due to the amenity effect. #a2council
My five year old was paging through the Observer when he asked me gravely, “daddy, what does ‘from the windows, to the walls’ mean?” When I told him, “till all skeet-skeet, motherfucker!,” he started crying. #a2council
BREAKING | Mayor Taylor seen preparing to distribute candy in order to corruptly influence future voters. #a2council
BREAKING | Photographic evidence reveals how Neighbors for More Neighbors A2 corruptly influenced Democratic officials to embrace pro-housing reforms. #a2council
Opinion | I am normal and can be trusted at a library. #a2council
I was a lifelong progressive Democrat. But then the Lieutenant Governor of Michigan opposed a ballot measure funded by landlords and Republicans, so now I'm voting for Jill Stein for a third time. #a2council
Opinion | If you agree with me you are smart. If you disagree with me you are dumb and pitiful. #a2council
It is alarming how many people are easily fooled by glossy flyers full of misinformation funded by landlords and republicans that are illegally glued to public property at midnight by disgruntled former #a2council members. This is not ok.
Opinion | You might think of an out-of-town landlord as an “out-of-town landlord.” But you would be missing the essence of that person’s essential essences. #a2council