Yep, a common anecdote from European science conferences is that by the second day, everybody do settle into the thick, averaged Spanish/German/French/Italian/Russian accent of their English which is pretty much equally understandable to everyone present except from the actual guys from Oxford, England.

Like, "passage" and "massage", why do they not rhyme in English? They're both borrowed French words! And don't even start me on how English pronounce "hangar"... that's like, what if you tried to pronounce this word as differently from the original as possible while still plausibly having the same spelling.

What if we remount the filesystem(s) at /dev/sda as read-only first? Then make a small ramfs with statically-linked curl in it and exec it. Hmm. Ideally, you'd also want to call reboot(2) after it's done...