watching this video of Danzig from 2018 and can't tell if he's getting shorter in his old age, or if that's just the force of Hell gradually pulling him down toward its infernos.
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ain't nobody got your back out there. you entered this world alone, and you will do your stupidest bits alone. 😤
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The Oregonian is a trash paper but you have GOT TO BE KIDDING ME selecting this photo to accompany a story about the wrongful death suit for this young man.
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did somebody say #LaserPose? i thought i heard somebody say #LaserPose
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"i knew it was going to be bad. i did not know it was going to be THIS bad."




[IMAGE: screen capture of Jon Favreau's character Gutter from the movie PCU in a dream sequence where he testifies before the U.S. Senate]
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hello i was literally born just earlier today give boosts
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Royce from Transistor is the best villain in any video game i've played in like the last decade.
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👨‍⚕️ old-timey doctor: by injecting a weakened form of the disease, the body can develop antibodies before being exposed to a potent and dangerous form of the disease. i call it a vaccine!

👨‍⚕️ Dr. John Kellogg: placing this apparatus onto the patient's head will diminish his sexual urges . it's called a porkpie hat!
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my only true pleasure in life is dunking on the terrible websites of other law firms. i don't understand how i can get work for the next several minutes when i'm laughing at the fact this image actually exists on a dude's website:

like either spend two more minutes in photoshop fixing this, or let me into your secret law library of MASSIVE tomes that have all the extra secret laws in them, my dude.
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[last night at the Listening Session held by the Portland mayor and chief of police. a play in one act.]

citizen 1: hello. please stop any and all officers from coordinating actions and tactics with white supremacists.

moderator: folks, we understand you are angry but we need SOLUTIONS!!

citizen 2: remove white nationalist sympathizers from the police bureau immediately, please.

moderdator: look, the past has happened and it is valid you're upset, but this meeting is pointless if you don't offer SOLUTIONS!

citizen 3: hi the police literally doxed me and provided my personal information to neo nazis that threw a brick through my daughter's window. could you please stop this from happening and punish the officers involved?

moderator: i've got a fever and the only prescription is hearing SOLUTIONS!! i am the person in the first ten seconds of the infomercial spilling Tupperware into my face and then turning to the camera and shouting about how there must be some SOLUTIONSS!!

citizen 4: i personally support the police.

moderator: thank you.

mayor: thank you.

chief of police: thank you *takes notes*
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