Me before the advent of AI: Wish I'd lived to see the advent of AI

Me now: Welp

The light I use to put in eyedrops before sleep has three settings

1) the awful glare of 10,000 suns
2) medium
3) bright

Why is it when I hit "reply" to a Mastodon post, the poster's account name appears at the start of the reply? I'm replying to a thing they wrote, so it seems redundant.

Imagine you walked outside and your neighbor said, "Looks like storm's a-comin'". And instead of replying "yup", you said, "Hey you! Jim, my neighbor living at 123 Oak St! yup"

NFL broadcast when there's a bad call: Show one replay, maybe, unless we have commercials to play

NFL broadcast when there's a bad leg injury: Slow motion replays from so many angles that JFK conspiracy nuts think it's excessive

My daily opening guess came through! Now I need a new one...

🦢 Animal #99 🐔
I figured it out in 1 guess!
🟩
🔥 3 | Avg. Guesses: 10.4

https://metazooa.com
#metazooa

Strange trend in advertising: "Let's use humor in this ad."

"Great, what are you thinking?"

"What if there was a giant loser who was so obsessed with our product that it made everyone uncomfortable?"

"Um, that sounds counterproductive. But at least it would be funny I guess?"

"No, just awkward."

"You described your loss last week as humbling. How does it feel to win tonight?"

"It's humb... I mean, it really gives me some perspective, you know?"

When someone eats an apple: That's a healthy choice. How nice.

When someone eats an apple in a movie: Oh damn, everyone take notice! This brash motherfucker doesn't take no for an answer, and their gleaming white teeth are highly functional. They're so confident... maybe a little too confident? Maybe even villainous? The protagonist had better watch out.