Angry birds. Angrier squirrels.

The House of Representatives has reached this part of the IKEA instructions on how to pick a Speaker. #speakerofthehouse

When they finally elect the next Speaker of the House

Open up I know you're in there!
Fred, let's just go.
No! That squirrel keeps stealing our seed and he's not getting away with it!

Oh just plugging a bird feeder into a couch, as one does.

When you’re cut off from the egg nog.

Sorry kids, Santa appears to be having a mid-life crisis.

Sometimes when my phones dies and I can’t write stupid toots I bake bread in a Dutch oven.

Storm is already knocking down trees. Filing insurance claim as we speak.