Dom Francisco de Avis

286 Followers
98 Following
117 Posts

Late 15th century Portuguese admiral and conqueror. Because of some error in God's plan, I am on the Fediverse in 2026.

Interests include spices, seizing spices, mercantilism, finding Prester John Mastodon, cannons, sailing ships, not dying from scurvy, ocean currents, helping god recognize his own, determining longitude (if possible), serving rough justice, and King Manuel I.

[This is a character; Portugal did horrific shit that I condemn. This is a hapless bozo running amok in 2026.]

@domfrancisco Like chicken cordon bleu without the effort.
@domfrancisco I’ll get to work on a list of grievances.
Where the fuck is your king?

Bad news, haters! I have conquered the Fediverse! I'm in charge now.

Hope you like harvesting nutmeg.

Take it from me, behaving dishonorably in the Strait of Hormuz ends badly.
I spent years of my life at sea, jorkin it to comely swells and stabbing people with a pike if they didn't give me cloves and cinnamon. But I fear I missed my true calling: boning on camera for money.
Have you ever heard about pornography? Because wow!
We found a tribe of Beastie Boys and tried to escort them politely back to our king at the point of a sword, but one of them pulled out a device they called a "jammie," which caused us much suffering.
🎵Money makin'
Money money makin'
Super nutmeg
Nutmeg tradin'🎵
Hatred based on race, religion or gender is rooted in ignorance. Get to know people properly and there are so many legitimate reasons to hate them