Alice McFlurry

@[email protected]
0 Followers
216 Following
173 Posts

In the process of moving over to @Alice



Profile photo is a low res screenshot of me drinking some Slurpees in my “hit” 2007 YouTube video, Two Cups One Girl. 



https://justmytoots.com/@[email protected]cial

Alice McFlurryDec 25, 2022

I’m going to move servers to @Alice which means I’ll also be moving my toots. Apologies in advance for the repetition as I try to consolidate everything.

I intend to re-follow everyone over there, but please let me know if I missed you.

Alice McFlurryDec 25, 2022
Ikea should prioritize their instructions by what can be done from least drunk to most drunk.
Alice McFlurryDec 25, 2022
Jon BakerDec 24, 2022

ME: Waterboarding implies the existence of Earthboarding, Airboarding and Fireboarding

THE CIA: Go on

Show threadAlice McFlurryDec 25, 2022
@Stoned_Deva_ Bailey-boo looks so sweet. I had to say goodbye to my cat, Pixel, earlier in the month. Sending as much love as an internet stranger can possibly give.
Alice McFlurryDec 25, 2022
FRO VODec 24, 2022

GENIE: what is your first wish

JOE: i want to be rich

GENIE: granted. and what is your second wish

RICH: i want lots of money

Alice McFlurryDec 25, 2022
𝚁𝚊𝚢 Dec 24, 2022
Business in front, law firm specializing in personal injury lawsuits in the back
Alice McFlurryDec 25, 2022
geekystevenDec 24, 2022

My daughter: How does Santa know where we are?

Me: He can track our heat signature, like the Predator.

Alice McFlurryDec 25, 2022
This milkshake is a little too viscous but I’m just going to have to suck it up.
Alice McFlurryDec 24, 2022

Adam’s breakup song to Eve: I want my baby back baby back baby back baby back.

#chilis #barbecuesauce

Show threadAlice McFlurryDec 24, 2022
@itsBabySmith. Because of this, I seriously think I’m team aluminum foil from this point forward. Plus, after you open presents, you can use it to ensure your cinnamon rolls don’t stick to the pan.