This is a fun one. I might post this on to the public TL later.

This is the first submission I got when I opened submissions for my magazine. The kid that wrote it was a nice guy, he told me that he wanted to write for vice. Then he sent me this. Apparently he was pretty high when he wrote it.

I thought it was the funniest thing I'd ever read, and decided to publish it.

He has since appeared on stage with me, and read it aloud.

I highly encourage you to read it word for word.