From the Public Radio Alliance and Minnow Beats Whale, it’s Penis.

I have officially missed my train. I think if I tried real hard, I could disembowel myself with a paper clip. We should get Gary Crapshoes on the call and see what he thinks....it’s saying he’s not available. I’ll keep trying him.

I wonder if we can get a 14th new person on this call to shrug their shoulders at this known issue no one is going to fix today? I’m going to rip my eyes out to look at the back of my head without a mirror.

I’m going to pass all the time they’re keeping me here doing nothing by singing the David Bowie album Outside in its entirety, *including* the spoken word monologues from Baby Grace, Ramona A. Stone and Algeria Touchshriek.

I’m gonna be late for my train today because this system fucking sucks and we keep seeing the same problems and fuckups every fucking time, but I got to toot Horse Penis Lovecraft, so all in all I broke even.

Horse Penis Lovecraft

They sent a system maintenance period for precisely the time we needed it for testing. Keystone fucking Kops over here. (These are apparently the toots you followed me for, and you can’t unfollow me now, it’s against the law.)

My father just told Alexa to play Simply Irresistible.