How I left Twitter

🎵Thunderbolts and lightning, very, very frightening me
Galileo, Galileo
Galileo, Galileo
Galileo, Figaro - magnificooooooooo🎵

“Sorry, stranger. There’s only good boys in this town. Best if you kept moving.”

🎵AND I’M HERE,
TO REMIND YOU,
OF THE MESS YOU LEFT WHEN YOU WENT AWAY🎵

“Did I turn the stove off? I think I turned the stove off. I’m pretty sure I did. Or did I? I better go back and check…”

King Charles right now:

Why does this maned wolf look like it just ended an eight week run with the touring company of “Chicago”?

“Honey, why did you want to take a photograph standing right here?”

People will post a picture like this online and write something like “Yeah, this is my grandfather when he was 11.”