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Normie-adjacent weirdo with a lifelong lucky streak of stumbling into the social periphery of amazing, excellent people.

OK, fine, "reply guy."

FACTS ABOUT MASTODON

If you are curious about leaving the cooked turkey site and going to the elephant site, here are some important tips:

1. It sucks. But then, so does every site.

2. You can still shitpost. Take great glee.

3. Picking your server instance is super important.

Ideally you should start at a large instance, and leave because it's full of white suburban NIMBY reactionaries who joined in November because they were promised 0 uncomfortable experiences in their lives and lash out whenever this turns out not to be the case.

Then you move to a smaller server where suddenly you can't talk to your friends because the admin of your instance is feuding with the admin of their instance. Then you wait a month before you can move again.

In this regard, the feudal structure of Mastodon instances is very like early 2000s message boards, whenever the admin got drunk and deleted the site.

4. You can work around the feudalism by running Mastodon yourself. It's the size of a mastodon and costs a fortune.

You can run Pleroma, which is smaller, and is also favoured by Nazis by unfortunate historical accident. Pleroma is perfectly good software that fulfils a need for something smaller than Mastodon, but also the devs are definitely not Nazis but are the other ten guys at the table.

There was a hilarious moment where the guy behind Spinster was so obnoxious he got kicked out of Pleroma and started his own fork called Soapbox/Rebased. He is now known as Soapbox Terf.

The nice people went to Pleroma fork Akkoma, which Soapbox Terf calls the "tr***y server", a review I understand they were delighted by. Try that.

There's also Misskey, which is a bit weird and Japanese, and supports cat ears right there in the protocol.

5. Any bozo who complains about your posts with assertions about the Fediverse that assume it all runs on the rules of mastodon.social is one of the suburban NIMBYs and invariably joined in November. Block and don't look back.

6. If anyone annoys you about your posting, you can improve their feed for them by blocking them from ever seeing your posts. The blocking tools are marvellous.

7. There are NO QUOTE TWEETS on Mastodon and anyone who wants QUOTE TWEETS is an invader, pollutant and corrupting influence despoiling the suburban vistas of Mastodon who only wants quote tweets so they can wreak EVIL.

So quote-tweeting is well supported in Akkoma and Misskey (and forks thereof), is in the Treehouse fork of Mastodon, and will be coming to more Fediverse software soon.

UPDATE: once enough other fedi software adopted quoting, Mastodon finally put it in, implemented gratuitously differently because fuck you.

8. In Mastodon, Eugen Rochko has achieved the creation of something greater than himself. And he will *never forgive it*.

9. The Fediverse interprets Website Boy as damage and routes around him.

10. Mastodon is yet another demonstration that worse is better. So come onto Mastodon, and *be* that worse.
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EDIT: this post is attracting some very dumb reply guys. Consider *not* posting debate club fatuity.

Come through, I just set a necrocobblercon out to cool

The #AntiFascistFrog speaks!

"So I'm out here protesting in a frog costume to, especially in a Frog costume, just to show how ridiculous the notion that we are violent terrorists is. It's just to showcase how that narrative is wrong."

#Portland #Antifa #Frog

Madness period mastodon had people absolutely livid about how they had better definitely never include this feature or that feature because folks got convinced that it was software options that made people insufferable rather than for example "being people" made people insufferable
i feel like having some gutwrenching heartbreaks is part of living but i bet additionally it would be fine to not have those
I've noticed the opposing team's fans only cheer when the opponents score on us. To win those fans over, I recommend we score on ourselves repeatedly; that will surely make them so happy they'll start supporting us. And I'm sure all our fans will keep cheering for us—who else is there to cheer for?

Lol, the fash misplayed the Kimmel thing so badly now they've got *checks notes* The Guardian talking like Ben Bagdikian.

https://www.theguardian.com/media/2025/sep/26/kimmel-controversy-tv-broadcasting-consolidation

Kimmel controversy highlights ‘wildly dangerous’ consolidation of TV broadcasting

Rush to ‘preempt’ Kimmel’s talkshow after FCC chair’s threats comes as broadcasters seek merger approvals

The Guardian
this probably feels good when you’re a printer
actions speak louder than bottom text