@0x00string Sorry to hear you're feeling beaten up right now.
I'm sure nothing I say on here will help with whatever you're going through, but truth be told, you don't suck.
If you believe you suck, then you'll naturally gravitate more toward that belief. But if you believe, like I do, that you actually DON'T suck, then you'll more naturally gravitate toward that.
Regardless though, I know the feeling well, and I know the feeling sucks.
Take care of yourself.
Many of us in the #infosec 🌎, myself included, are introverts.
For us introverts, spending time with family and friends can be exhausting - not because we don't like it, but simply because we as introverts recharge by being away from people rather than with them.
Give yourself permission to take breaks from "peopling" this holiday season. It's okay to step away, to recharge, and to take care of you.
Rest in the peace that comes with the knowledge that you do, in fact, know what you're talking about.
It's okay to be an #infosec expert.