EDIT: Man, this did numbers! Thanks to all who keep boosting! It makes my heart sing. I will update the update when/if anything changes. 
Ok, oddly specific ask, but if ANYONE has one of these laying around doing nothing, can I buy it from you? Early 2000s Lucent wifi yagi. It's a nostalgia item, but it will be used. Throw me a message or something if you have one and don't want $250 for it.
Saw this on Reddit (thanks /u/n00bznet) and I figured I know enough people that might be in the desert this week...
BREAKING: Adolescent girl (Name: Miss Crow) apprehended after allegedly performing a physical denial of service attack against local infrastructure. (WIfi access point pushed off of table it resides on.)
Photo of suspect attached. She has been released on her own recognizance pending prelimeownary snuggles.