I do not have any pets, sadly. The closest is the guinea pigs that @Nigma has. They're called Alfred and Rufus and they're little assholes who eat and sleep all day
@Gargron is it true that Big Yud tried to write a fanfic based on the Discworld universe and the result it had on him was that he gave up entirely, secretly stopped being a rationalist, and now only believes in the arcane
@Gargron dang, I didn't consider that. i was just goin' by the nickname i've heard in quite a few places. maybe i'll start calling him Big Eli or something