PugJesus

Pretty fly for a white guy

https://piefed.social/c/historymemes/p/2004735/pretty-fly-for-a-white-guy

Apr 23 at 5:45amWeb
Show threadurushitan 漆たんApr 23
fork
Show threadlime!Apr 23
funk
Show threadNigelFrobisherApr 23
“fain” is new to me. This stupid language never ends.
Show threadHadriscusApr 23
you’d never get invited for coffee and smokes
Show threadaddieApr 23

Well, you take the rough with the smooth with English:

Smooth:

  • verb conjugation rules are straightforward
  • adjective declension is trivial - don’t do it
  • easy to make most plurals, only a handful of exceptions to learn
  • no grammatical gender

Rough:

  • can’t have too many words that mean almost-but-not-quite the same thing
  • spelling is the fever dream of a madman. In particular, eighteen or so vowel sounds represented by five letters, words transliterated from other languages that may or may not have their pronunciation changed, words that have had their pronunciation changed over the centuries but spelling hasn’t been updated. Because fuck you, that’s why.
  • putting two words together to make noun phrases that don’t have the meaning of either word
  • a plethora, indeed a veritable abundance, of strange grammatical forms

You mostly take the rough, to be fair.

Show threadSamskaraApr 24

English is simplified Germanic with French words, that never got a spelling reform.

Foul fowls of goose become geese
and yet moose are never meese
multiple mouse are mice
but house are never hice

English is three languages wearing a trench coat

Issue #156: a very weird engineering interview, a dispatch from the Eras tour, and good distraction

Medium
Show threadPugJesusApr 23
Fain is very archaic, it’s not something that would be used anymore. Even back in 1906 it was archaic.
Show threadjaaakeApr 23
Genuinely thought it was an older spelling of “feign,” but have learned that they are homophones that have opposite meanings. Like a contronym, but phonically… a controphone.
Show threadMinnesotaGoddamApr 23
dude not cool
Show threadDifficultCobblestoneApr 23
Show threadMinnesotaGoddamApr 23

also reported for homophonia. be better.
Show threadMinnesotaGoddamApr 23
wait i know that word and i know how to parse it but i don’t know what the fuck it means. nobody tell me it is hidden in the coffee
Show threadAeronMelonApr 23
The archaic way of enumerating things in prose “two and ninety” is the best part. Perfect comedic reveal.
Show threadtoofpicApr 23
Ha, never learn Danish!
Show threadGriffusApr 23
To og halv fems!
Show threadSubArcticTundraApr 23
I think it’s also used in archaic English ‘four and twenty blackbirds, baked in a pie’
Show threadSerinusApr 23
Four score and seven years ago
Show threadvaultdweller013Apr 23
The and is a bit weird but I do sometimes break large numbers down like that, for example if I’m looking at an address I won’t say 1050 I won’t say one thousand fifty ill say ten fifty.
Show threadMinnesotaGoddamApr 23
no that’s 420 blackbirds. it’s a very high pie.
Show threadjaaakeApr 23
The timing of “two… PLUS ANOTHER NINE WITH A ZERO AFTER IT” is something I’ll never experience in my native tongue.
Show threadJ92Apr 23
Is it 180? 290? 92?
Show threadjaaakeApr 23
The last. Much like Americans with their dates, English would occasionally put the smallest unit first.
Show threadcaptainlezbianApr 23
German still does this. The French are even worse.
Show threadAngryCommieKenderApr 23

Pray tell what is wrong with quatre vignt y douze?

Other than the fact that it has been decades since I took French and probably misspelled every single word there.

Show threadOriginEnergySuxApr 23
Reminds me of my old blue collar job when we used to poke the new guy at work to see if they’re on the level lol
Show threadJanxApr 23
“Ow, stop poking me, that stick is sharp!”
Show threadOriginEnergySuxApr 23
“…well he’s not on the level”
Show threadExLisperApr 23
I once haggled over a hat with some street salesman in Arabic. Managed to take it down from 10 to 8 dirhams. Then I felt bad from haggling over 50 cents with a guy that probably ears in a year what I make in a week. I still have the hat though.
Show threadWanderingThoughtsApr 23
Nah. They love the haggle. And he most likely still made a nice profit. If they announce 10, you can bet they still turn a profit at 4.
Show threadlauhaApr 23
From a book called Orientations by Ronald Storrs from 1937
Show threadKlankyApr 23
The original ‘the everyone clapped’?
Show threadfakeman_pretendnameApr 23
“Applause was brought forth by all onlookers to our exchange of wits”
Show threadSharkAttakApr 24
Then someone stood up, and was President Theodore Roosevelt! Who proceeded to shake my hand.
Show threadAgent641Apr 23
Inshallah everyone clapped
Show threadNilsApr 23
I wish I had this level of eloquence in my youth, I wish it at an old age too.
Still, I was never a fan of “yo mama” jokes. Where I grew up, bring up someone’s mother in such manner as a sure way to start a melee. Except maybe for “your mom is hot” if it sounds more like a compliment.
Show threadpapalonianApr 23

In no hostility to my straw hat but desiring to shine before his friends

Killed him before he even started